Get the sense that my body was slowly deteriorating and is now healing really rapidly.
Better get to work on making a hypothetical future middle age bearable.
Conversation
I'm all for conscientious self-destruction and I won't judge a bit of compulsive behaviour.
But if you're doing it because you're too much of a dumb fuck to accept it'll catch up with you, it's hard to feel much sympathy.
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Eh, people are what they are, and even by a generous definition, most have so little free will that it's hard to blame they for much of anything.