"Sindre" is a guy I made up to interact with you in a way you (hopefully) can tolerate. Without you, there's just a primate doing its thing.
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Not that this makes Sindre or the primate less real. But Sindre is contingent on society, whereas the primate depends only on survival.
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Having a self in the former sense is useful and indeed necessary to function in a social role, but it doesn't need to determine everything.