Also a problem of patience. You're not designed to be responsive to another person every hour of the day. Wears down willpower.
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one of the best signs of a good relationship to me is someone I can be with without either of us requiring anything
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Agreed, but our kid puts a wrench in that. High need baby with capital H. Polish culture is also remarkably toxic to parents.
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yeah, in theory you can do it as a householder, but it is just harder. And kids are lashing to the wheel, not spouses.
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Whereas more difficult practice & circumstances seem to keep me going more effectively. No clue as to why. Schooling, possibly.
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there will be a feeling, it's a form of resistance. It will be in the body and maybe a thought/mental image.
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Always had some kind of issue with system thinking. I can reverse-engineer and adopt with ease, but struggle with creating systems.
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Well, remember, from a cultivation point of view, it really isn't important. just an aspect of the body. and not disqualifying
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some issues make enlightenment virtually impossible till dealt with, this doesn't, thus not disqualifying.
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If someone has a thoroughly understood method for getting enlightened (and can show me my mistakes), I'm fairly certain I can do it.
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yeah, that's hard. The people who do usually have it on terms that sound ridiculous to westerners. They aren't, but...
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also some methods require a lot of time/commitment. Near guaranteed results, but probably not suitable for you.
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Lots of good thoughts here. So what seems like the best option, in your opinion?
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For example, Naga Saddhu initiate training will get you a long way, it's simple and almost foolproof.
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Here it is. For 6 months to a year, sit next to the Saddhu fire and keep it going, while chanting the mantra your guru gave you.
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you will be in a trance almost all your waking hours almost immediately (fire staring + mantra) and that will sort out tons
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that will fix all of your physical problems held thru tension, for example, de-program most of your thought problems, etc...