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In addition to being sweet and loving, this is also condescending as fuck, yes.

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A few days of determined meditation and I'm back to soft disinterested concern "oh, my poor children, you have been so foolish".

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Mmh. Funniest personal side-effect of meditation is that I become completely unable to take neuroticism seriously. Seems common.

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and if they'll let me help, then in many ways they don't need my help, I'm just the vehicle.

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Mmh, but often the problem for people is that they have the ability, the will and the attitude, but lack the clarity to see it.

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and most of it I know what it is.

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Same, but my wife's "I'm here to kick ass and chew organically grown salads - and I'm all out of salads" attitude is helpful there.