Arguing took on a kind of vicious cycle, one feeding the other. Until I just stopped. Said "I don't want to argue, and I'm sorry." It worked
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Argument, political or personal, is often just psychological violence. Nonviolence works just as well there as in mass protest. Disengage.
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You are not prohibited from presenting your case without hurting the other party. You can be strong without being aggressive.
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This has nothing to do with PC notions of rudeness and politeness. Manners aside, here is a clear difference between attacking and defending
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If you only ever defend, while simultaneously acknowledging the other side's perspective, it takes the gas out of most arguments very fast.