More and more convinced that I have become someone else recently in some way that is both real and important, and also indescribable.
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Sometimes having these flashes of memory that feel depersonalized, like watching a film, but they're just "me" from some time ago.
Other memories don't share this quality.
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Not sure why I'm sharing this on Twitter when I can't really explain it anyway, but there it is.
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Perhaps the weirdest bit of the puzzle is I've been this person before, when I was much younger.
It's like that entire personality was locked away behind some door.
Waiting.
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The last time I was this person, I lacked some very basic experiences necessary to protect myself in a social environment.
This time, I don't feel that same sense of naive uncertainty. This makes me very happy.
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Speaking of memories. I realized a while ago that there was something off about my memory. Something not working right.
Seems, specifically, I couldn't remember much that was wistful or light or positive without melancholy without strong prompting. This is no longer the case.