who is the most emotionally intelligent person you know?
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Generally speaking, my grandmother. Nobody else comes particularly close.
Also myself, for a very specific (narrow) bandwidth of emotional intelligence.
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I grew up very emotionally defensive and withdrawn.
My grandma is just about the only person from that period whom I'd feel comfortable to be open around, and who could cut through my BS when I wasn't.
Too many examples to recount, but she made a huge difference for me.
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... in very rare crisis situations, I turn into an emotional superconductor and find that I know and understand all my grandmother's tricks.
Nothing much bothers me then, and I tend to be almost unnervingly calm, even if people I'm usually attuned to are losing their shit.