It is easier to deconstruct the sense of self if you clarify the sense of self first.
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'Where's the point of most pressure?' is a framing that's been doing a lot of work for me since learning it.
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My default sensory reality has gained a lot of spacial fidelity in the past few months.
These spatial intuitions are pretty fundamental to all kinds of insight meditation-ish work, if you employ it that way.
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And it really does change sense of self.
E.g. to operate effectively as a person, I always need to put a lot of conscious weight on feelings and/or thoughts.
Anything else and 'Sindre' ends up more as an abstract entity in awareness, qualitatively unremarkable.
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This isn't just an academic distinction, either. 'Sindre' struggles to act coherently without deep embodiment.
Whereas personal feelings and thoughts also become a lot less salient, and can be mostly ignored.
(Decisions seem guided more by impulse and situational reactivity.)
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Yeah, perhaps the main difference between awakening and disassociation is the level of embodiment. Awakening should be deeply embodied
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More to it than that, I think. Different levels of resolution feel more organic than that.
Ordinary embodiment is quite distinct from... metaembodiment?
Holding both this quality of nearness and distance in consciousness at once produces profoundly odd, symbolical sensation.
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I also think that's one of the key crossings between meditation and magic. Weaving egregorical embryos out of basic sensory experience.
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Everyone does. It's just most people use only the pre-installed codecs.
Nothing wrong with that, though. It's usually the safer (& saner) option.
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I don't think even the "weavers" really understand how they are being weaved.
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This would be my main reason for not hanging out in that space much.
Not big on the latent symbolism of the collective (un)conscious.
Lots of creepy shit out there, ready to be absorbed.
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