In the process of shedding various lingering traumas and conditioning, you're left in a sort of weird twilight zone.
Part unadulterated bliss, part sticky old memories that just really, really need a hug, part genuine bafflement.
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If you're relatively detached and at ease, it's hard not to be just sort of happy most of the time.
Then something old and wounded gets triggered, and all of a sudden you're lurching back into attached anxiety.
This happens a lot more when there is less mental content overall.
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But ah, play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
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the difference is, at least one gets what's going on with oneself. pretty much a win.
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Oh, hey, not complaining. The difference is like night and, uh, at least early morning. Massive QOL upgrade.
It's just funny how some of the half-bakedness of it causes this really intense mood whiplash.
But more intense and varied feelings are generally part of the picture, so
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