4. Cultivate non-sitting practice.
Sitting when householding is important, but a luxury.
If you want hobbies, friends, a job, exercise, family time... sitting consistently becomes difficult. Do it when able.
I rarely sit these days. I rarely have to. Practice mostly in vivo.
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5. Work technique first.
If you sit a lot, technique tends to self-correct. You have time to feel around the edges. "Just sit."
In live practice, bad technique will fuck your relationships straight up. Or make you go crazy.
Read well, consult trusted sources, apply carefully.
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E.g. when I had more of a sitting practice, I'd sometimes juggle the order of the Cutting Machinery stages.
Never, ever do this around a person you care about. You need equanimity for the emotional processing, or you are liable to do very bad, stupid things.
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6. Have fun, take breaks.
The body has a way of knowing when it's had enough. The burdens of householding can have this come up a lot.
I used to feel bad about lapses in practice. Now I just let them happen. If you're motivated, the drive will come back when conditions improve.
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It took me *years* to get one of my long term meditation folks to accept the impulse to take breaks. Well done.
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I learned this after almost getting divorced on account of my own emotional bullshit, so I'm not sure how much of it is to my credit!
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Yeah, I can't say much about that yet. I get brief disintegrations, no lasting depersonalisation. Need to work more on my concentration.
Maybe the answer is in taking retreats? I'm not sure. What does think?
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My process basically consisted in running blindfolded into the walls & stumbling over furniture until I finally learned the outlines of the room.
It's really difficult to find a framework today that doesn't entail joining some cult, or moving to Asia for a while. Huge problem.
The whole process is very DIY, so i count myself lucky that I'm rarely dissuaded by breaking my own face, as it were.
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Sort of wonder it setting up a Slack or something for householders would be a good idea.
Get down some FAQs, develop best practices...?
Hm.
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