So why is it I never learned to pace myself elsewhere, to keep a slow, relentless pace that eventually wins the race?
Hell if I know. Sometimes I do, when something really matters. I can keep going through a lot of abuse.
But far, far more often, I follow the normal pattern.
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I've always had an annoyingly competitive streak, and will usually only spend time on games where I can win.
I know, it's a weakness and a folly, but is what it is.
Problem is, I'll play angry, play insensibly, play hurried. Lose, from a lack of discipline. From going too fast.
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So recently I had one game I was playing that I'd frustrate myself with, and struggle with. Spotty record. Good streaks, bad streaks.
Then I got fed up and decided only to play when I felt good. Suddenly, 0 losses. Very unusual level of focus. I hit the right pace.
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So it's not just a question of physical endurance.
It's a behavioural pattern where I satisfice into the most consistent performance I can manage. In anything.
Problem is, I can only access this pattern in a niche range of situations, and constantly fool myself out of it.
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Almost anything that looks like an "attribute" is a skill. It's an objective pattern of behaviours. It has components.
Today as we hiked, I paid attention to what was happening. I think I figured it out, too; I was listening.
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Basically, I'd walked myself into a trance where a bigger part of conscious bandwidth was detailed to the body's signals.
Is my chest feeling tighter at this pace? Are the muscles getting sorer? Am I breathing faster?
You attend, you attend, you attend. Legs keep walking.
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Eventually, you hit a stride where you know any faster, any harder, any stronger means more ache, shallower breathing, more tightness.
You slip into this space. You walk the very edge of it. You attend. Eventually, you probably find you're speeding up again. You catch up.
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Obviously, not every skill is transferable, but this is more of a meta-skill, answering a simple question - how much can you take?
Not just now, nor for the next five minutes. How much can you really take, if you have to keep taking it?
This answers many, many other questions.
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Replying to
...something about the specific wording of this opened a small door in my head.
I pace myself HORRIBLY over the long haul - like, the weeks/months of completing a long project or just "how many things can I reasonably expect to do in a day?"
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But I've literally never asked myself a question like "if I had to do this day again, busy as it was, every day for six months, could I take it?"
I'm asking it now and the answers are surprising me.
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Replying to
Yeah, it's a common problem, and I have it all over the place.
But I've surprised the hell out of people before, by knowing *exactly* what I could take. It's a skill, not a trait! May be derived from traits, though.
I am insanely stubborn when it comes down to it.
This whole thread felt a bit self-indulgent from me, and I have to go to bed ASAP, but I'll try to remember to address some wider points tomorrow.
I think knowing thyself is key - and what sorts of abilities you have, or lack, and what you can do with them, is an essential part.
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