All thoughts are self-serving. That is, they serve their own putposes - not "your" intent.
It takes a lot of self-knowledge to guess accurately at those purposes.
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Introspection is nice and all, but mostly it's sloppy storytelling done to hide the fact that we don't really know ourselves.
Your very own inner narcissist.
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Your conscious pseudo-self lives in a horrifying reality. Tightly embedded with certain aspects of executive function, it craves the predictability & control it always lacks.
Imagine a manager with no control over their team. That's that thing in your head that calls itself You.
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To hide its fear and frustration, it writes reports, plans & analysis for every decision made. Whether it took part in making that call or not.
Like a narcissist in a world that isn't about them, it strives to catch everything in its own orbit.
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It's easy to get frustrated or angry about this. I know I have, especially when it's burnt me.
It helps to realize that this part of you is almost helpless to do otherwise. But maybe you can help it to do better?
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