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these flips? 48 hours ago you couldn’t walk! what the hell is a cat, man?pic.twitter.com/g1uVGzd9Hk
official diagnosis from her vet: miette most likely ate a lizard and tripped so hard that she lost control of her body from the neck down and went temporarily blind for 36 hours. her bloodwork is completely normal but she will go forth as someone who has Seen God.
existential question: will she always be high from now on?
this is the first time I’ve laughed about it because honestly the attack itself was so frightening that Jason and I burst into tears simultaneously and yelled, “she’s dying!!!” but YOU’RE TELLING ME A LIZARD DID THIS???
*matthew mcconaughey car commercial voice* because this isn’t madame curie. this is Miette.
this originally happened during an episode of stargate: sg1. and Jason and I were crying in the car that we were never going to be able to watch stargate again. it was the one where they join a seattle sex cult dedicated to erotically worshiping the great god Seth.
and as we were carrying an insensate miette through the living room the tv was paused on sam carter’s face trying to seem so horny for Seth. she looked like a Precious Moment that had been specially issued to commemorate the death of JFK. and both of us were sobbing out loud.
there it is. and in the background I’m frantically passing a hand back and forth in front of miette’s completely black, nightmare portal eyes and whimpering, “jason … she cannot see me!”pic.twitter.com/gxykz9BTtF
last night. watching the next episode of stargate. jason, shuddering: I just don’t know if I can ever go through another night like that again— me, immediately interrupting: jason, she’s under the couch. and she’s got another lizard.
cut to me in six months, incurably insane, in a special institution being treated for Lizard Vigilance
there appear to be no lingering effects, but how could you tell if there werepic.twitter.com/WVDeggXyQF
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