Tom Gannon

@TheTomGannon

Math PhD student. Writer for . Founder of . These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration.

Austin, TX
tomgannonmath.wordpress.com
Joined August 2009
18 Photos and videos Photos and videos

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  1. Jun 18

    Hello here is my contribution to the artistic dialogue thank you very much for your support

    3 likes
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  2. Mar 31

    Pro Tip: Do your taxes on April 1 so you have an excuse if you screw then up.

    7 likes
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  3. Mar 18

    Actually Mr. Twain, I view myself as a PERMANENTLY embarrassed millionaire thank you very much!

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  4. Feb 19

    My bus started to say “Thank a Veteran” which is nice, except for when it switches between that and “Not in Service.”

    4 likes
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  5. Jan 25

    Just wait until the “all you need is love” people hear about food.

    1 retweet 5 likes
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  6. Retweeted
    Jan 20

    The Little Engine That Could succeeded because it believed in itself. Does that make it a self esteam engine?

    3 retweets 9 likes
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  7. Retweeted
    Jan 20

    “So pissed my kid wants to do a fun career-building activity he enjoys instead of standing on a cold field getting brain damage.”

    310 replies 3,146 retweets 28,108 likes
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  8. 25 Dec 2018

    I wonder if Clarence practiced hard enough that Santa brought him a new saxophone.

    2 likes
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  9. 8 Dec 2018

    Took one of those "Can we guess where you're from based on the words you use quizzes." So strange that the people in my hometown are the ones that say things correctly.

    1 reply 2 likes
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  10. 6 Dec 2018

    My weather app is so confident that it will tell me that there is a 0% chance of rain when it is currently raining.

    10 likes
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  11. 19 Nov 2018

    Improv is to theater as ska is to music.

    6 likes
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  12. 12 Nov 2018

    The whole elevator door doesn’t go up with you, only half of it does. You get a new half when you get to your new floor.

    2 replies 1 like
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  13. 7 Nov 2018

    I just went on a walk for the first time in a while and multiple times I thought “Wow! I haven’t been here since Pokémon Go came out.”

    1 reply 6 likes
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  14. 1 Nov 2018

    If the game was really called "Super Smash Bros" instead of "Super Smash Brothers" the characters would never fight--they would just threaten to fight each other all of the time.

    3 likes
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  15. Retweeted
    10 Oct 2018

    Theio’s got demolished today. I knew there’s a reason I feel off today, one of my horcruxes got destroyed.

    3 replies 7 retweets 23 likes
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  16. 9 Oct 2018

    Today I learned that exactly 36 people wrote in someone for the 2000 presidential election in Florida, and I also learned the amount of time I am willing to procrastinate working by going on Wikipedia.

    1 like
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  17. Retweeted
    4 Oct 2018

    I'm tired of litigating this point, but if you say 7 or 8 things that are very likely but not quite certain to be lies, it's essentially certain that at least one of them is a lie.

    Re slang, groups of friends in HS often come up w/ their own private vocabularies—nicknames,terms based on inside jokes,etc There is no reason, eg, that BK and his friends couldn’t have played a drinking game that they called Devil’s Triangle. Urban dictionary can’t answer this
    476 replies 2,394 retweets 12,904 likes
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  18. 2 Oct 2018

    I am good at thinking and I am good at overthinking, but I am not good at telling which is which.

    1 retweet 9 likes
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  19. 25 Sep 2018

    The Only Math Fact I Know That Is Scary

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  20. 17 Sep 2018

    My melatonin bottle says "For short term use only" but life is short so I'm ok.

    6 likes
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