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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion May 23

    Historians Discover Thomas Jefferson May Have Secretly Fathered Multiple Other Countries https://trib.al/vbNMaoy pic.twitter.com/BMLi3lJg07

    5:47 PM - 23 May 2018
    • 361 Retweets
    • 2,075 Likes
    • - Cassandra Myers Ian Woods Ozzie William De Spacito Travis Benton 17 (s)pook AdorableEspurr
    23 replies 361 retweets 2,075 likes
      1. Magical Ham Shake‏ @MagicalHamShake May 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I always thought Australia looked a bit like Jefferson

        0 replies 0 retweets 18 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Sugar Booger  🐶‏ @tommitom24 May 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        best maury episode

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      3. I'll think of a better username later‏ @optimisticynic9 May 23
        Replying to @tommitom24 @TheOnion

        You are not... the founding father

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. Todd Gross‏ @TGinNV May 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        You know, I always wondered how Haiti got its independence so early...

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. Ryan W.‏ @Shoes_of_Red May 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        He might be Lafayette's baby's daddy

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
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      1. MT‏ @MikeTomasek May 24
        Replying to @TheOnion

        "No No... I'm just going over to France for a bit and then I'll be right back"

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. Sue Hutchinson‏ @rangerwyld May 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Ya know what they say about the "Founding FATHERS"...

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Video Game Perd Ghastly‏ @supermo0 May 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/E6sTTaTChz

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      3. 1 more reply
      1. Spooky doggo‏ @JJ_the_hyena May 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        The best thing about this article is that they included a pic of Jefferson looking like a guilty lil bitch which is perfect

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. ¤AngelBellz¤‏ @torihale5 May 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I believe that

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Hannu Siivonen‏ @HannuSiivonen May 24
        Replying to @TheOnion

        He raped some slave states

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. TravisRitenour‏ @ritenour_travis May 24
        Replying to @TheOnion @Directi0n_Tweet

        jefferson was one of the five people who drafted the declaration of independence the other four people were ben franklin john adams roger sherman and robert r livingston

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. James Rogue‏ @fablestudy May 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Just as I suspected.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Michael Echon‏ @mike_echon May 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        The Onion is on a roll! Like, literally...I'm eating a hamburger bun with onions on it.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Petey Isom‏ @PeteyIsom May 23
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I started my first planet. The moon. Earth was already overrun by clones. I figured out how to make it a success. Fill it with demand.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Petey Isom‏ @PeteyIsom May 23
        Replying to @PeteyIsom @TheOnion

        An oasis of hot bitches! And that's how I started a space race. By being a genius.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. End of conversation

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