So you're doing real news now?
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Take a look at real news... my local news station seems to just be the onion now
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"Yes officer, one of them said they had a dream."pic.twitter.com/44YIZoX3PM
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"Minestrone? SPEAK ENGLISH!"
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This is fake news. She wasn't nervous
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WORD. She was just bored.
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Nah, she was just nosy.
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It's HIS fault. He pronounced it MINES-TROWN.
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The onion isn’t even parody anymore.
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Wish this wasn’t so close to reality.
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When Onion headlines sound too real...
I miss the days when satire didn’t come so close to daily life. 
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I THINK THE TIMELINES ARE CROSSING. SATIRE IS REALITY.
#darkesttimeline#interdimentionalcable#IAMLOSTSOISALLThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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I thought the Onion was satire.
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