Skip to content
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • Moments Moments Moments, current page.

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
Verified account
@TheOnion

Tweets

The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

Tweets

  • © 2018 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion May 10

    MLB Bans Cruel Practice Of Castrating Mascots https://trib.al/a90zwFz pic.twitter.com/Y9qoCoqiiL

    7:24 AM - 10 May 2018
    • 174 Retweets
    • 1,170 Likes
    • Kate Slaugh The Ace Of Nothing Illmaster Chamber Edgar Chris Stalley Daniel Oglesby Karin Livingston Walter Melonne ebbac077
    25 replies 174 retweets 1,170 likes
      1. mat.thew‏ @ColossalTree May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        So you want to live in a world where these demon furries spread their seed amongst themselves, creating more heinous offspring? well i do too.

        0 replies 0 retweets 10 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Damian Churchwell‏ @MrThornRecords May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Well then they better start wearing pants.

        0 replies 0 retweets 8 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Nate‏ @ammadien May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        But think of all the unwanted mascot litters that will need to find homes.

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. wormbolt‏ @wormbolt May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Big mistake.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Ernie‏ @ErnieRiv_5 May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @steelernathan43 😂

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Nathan Fuller‏ @steelernathan43 May 10
        Replying to @ErnieRiv_5 @TheOnion

        Thank goodness

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. Ernie‏ @ErnieRiv_5 May 10
        Replying to @steelernathan43 @TheOnion

        They're gonna have to start wearing pants

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      5. Nathan Fuller‏ @steelernathan43 May 10
        Replying to @ErnieRiv_5 @TheOnion

        😂😂😂

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      6. End of conversation
      1. MultiCriliq‏ @MultiCriliq May 11
        Replying to @TheOnion

        is this loss

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Alex Preiss‏ @AlexPreiss4 May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Iowa Republican Senator Joni Ernst is dejected by the ban.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. MATTHEW MAGUIRE‏ @MATTHEW72081434 May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/FZSPuZtM8y

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. melondrama‏ @melondrama May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        what about declawing, tho?

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. average Joe‏ @JosephN18769788 May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Great now they're going to just be running wild in the streets.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Mo & Jinks‏ @MoandJinks May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        About time too

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. rob cooper‏ @crcooprob May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Really ! Are they going to support all of the little mascots that are going to running around our neighborhoods ?

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. diamond‏ @Diamond__Greene May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        waaiiiit, WHAT?!>!>!!> lols oh, right, its the onion.... sheesh

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Daniel Sanford‏ @Sanford117 May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        It amazes me that some parts of the American League Central still practiced this barbaric ritual.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo

    Loading seems to be taking a while.

    Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

      Promoted Tweet

      false

      • © 2018 Twitter
      • About
      • Help Center
      • Terms
      • Privacy policy
      • Cookies
      • Ads info