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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

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Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion May 9

    Area Man Excited To Hear Girlfriend Has Been Doing A Lot Of Thinking https://trib.al/Y4esrG9 pic.twitter.com/laAWmxojXw

    8:10 PM - 9 May 2018
    • 205 Retweets
    • 1,610 Likes
    • Andrew Ellison Nancy Duan a scissors Chris Summers Rich gracie qui-gon jinn & tonic Hugo Prévost Ike Davis
    11 replies 205 retweets 1,610 likes
      1. Anne McGreggor‏ @AnneAnniebean May 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA Said no guy EVER

        0 replies 0 retweets 8 likes
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      1. Tony D‏ @biff725 May 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I'd be thinking, I'm almost free. Ahhh the single life again, lol

        0 replies 1 retweet 2 likes
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      1. Spacehog  🇺🇸 🇻🇦 🇮🇱‏ @ckrollage May 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/uGl1EjBUou

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. New conversation
      2. Imogen Neilson‏ @ImogenNeilson May 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @AlexB1sh the article didn't add anything that a headline and a quote couldn't have achieved alone. Enjoyed though, 5/7.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Alex‏ @AlexB1sh May 9
        Replying to @ImogenNeilson @TheOnion

        It totally added to it , the ending punchline made me cackle

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      4. Imogen Neilson‏ @ImogenNeilson May 9
        Replying to @AlexB1sh @TheOnion

        Maybe I didn't get it :P

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      5. End of conversation
      1.  🎃 Jinnifer Douglass  🎃‏ @JI_N_NYC May 10
        Replying to @TheOnion

        They hate it when we do that

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Michael Thomas‏ @mikefromsask May 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Feels bad, man. Poor sap doesn't even know that means she is about to break up with him.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. FriedRice Nietzche‏ @SeabassMartinez May 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        With lips like that I would be too

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Jack Ingoldsby‏ @JackIngoldsby May 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I remember a girl I was dating saying "We need to talk." I immediately said "Fuck." She seemed put out that I assumed the worst, but as it turned out, my lack of sanguinity was completely justified.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Ernie‏ @ErnieRiv_5 May 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Oh boy....

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Rahul Kudva‏ @RahulKudva May 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Wait till she says, "We need to talk..."

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Grimmjow  🇭🇹 💪🏿 💯 ✊🏿 🙏🏿‏ @Rocknez_Monstah May 9
        Replying to @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/f7Wixr5HXv

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