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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion May 6

    Woman At Supermarket Imagines Entire Narrative Where Bagger Is Happy With Life https://trib.al/dYYAOkW pic.twitter.com/3q3jDYDmtQ

    10:19 AM - 6 May 2018
    • 210 Retweets
    • 1,437 Likes
    • 🌕🌑🎃Evil Dr. Meow Meow🎃🌑🌕 alex 🍂 Clarke Cameron aHumanbyMistake Haraku Count Stackula Texas Chainsaw Mattsacre Allan Trey Talbott
    15 replies 210 retweets 1,437 likes
      1. average Joe‏ @JosephN18769788 May 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Bagger goes home and sadly masturbates to the woman who made eye contact with him.

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Canadian_Front_Bacon‏ @1_uzername_gone May 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Unhappiness in your job is the perfect lesson for bettering yourself...but unfortunately being unhappy is all some people want to be...

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. We Gonna Be Alright‏ @RobFromSac May 6
        Replying to @1_uzername_gone @TheOnion

        Yeah. People want to be unhappy. What a healthy conclusion.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. Canadian_Front_Bacon‏ @1_uzername_gone May 6
        Replying to @RobFromSac @TheOnion

        There are more than some that do though...sad eh? ....no pun intended.

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      5. We Gonna Be Alright‏ @RobFromSac May 6
        Replying to @1_uzername_gone @TheOnion

        Well, it would be sad if it were true.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      6. Canadian_Front_Bacon‏ @1_uzername_gone May 6
        Replying to @RobFromSac @TheOnion

        So it's sad then...well maybe not in the city of trees, but here in the city of concrete, blacktop and unafordabillity it's rampant.. Sadly

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      7. End of conversation
      1. Leon Jacyna‏ @LeonJacyna May 7
        Replying to @TheOnion

        And the next time she shopped there he had been replaced by a self service check-out that was no less content with its lot.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Tommy McPines‏ @TMcpines May 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Jack Nicholson will come in and tell him he's his father

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Edgar‏ @mcdaddyissues91 May 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @markabaigar

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Spooky Nick or something‏ @SPURSandSTRIPES May 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I mean, maybe the bagger realizes when you die your bank account balance doesn't go up on a big board as a way of saying how worthwhile you are as a human and doesn't care to be swindling people in a board room but yeah let's keep reinforcing you can't be happy and not rich...

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Alex Preiss‏ @AlexPreiss4 May 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        At this point the Bagger is happier with life than Rudy Giuliani.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Just Paul‏ @S1R1USme May 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Women have amazing imaginations. I tried and only could get to "Bagger is happy shift is ending"

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Yovan‏ @YovanYavelar May 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Maybe he's sexist and is just happy he's not a woman

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Oasis Falafel of Omaha‏ @OasisOfOmaha May 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Lol #grocerystorelife

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. ponyponypony‏ @itsponypony May 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        every time ☹️

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. rpmurphy @ 東京10/27-11/5‏ @rpmurphy1 May 6
        Replying to @ZenSpeakeasy @TheOnion

        All these mass shootings, terrorist attacks and plots by racist white folks and none of y'all are on terror watchlists yet so your bullshit can miss me. 👋

        2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. End of conversation

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