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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Apr 29

    Report: 58% Of World’s Japanese Speakers White 23-Year-Old American Males https://trib.al/78JL1EU pic.twitter.com/t7x0uSoPkf

    5:40 PM - 29 Apr 2018
    • 1,381 Retweets
    • 7,979 Likes
    • Juan-Carlos Foust Christopher Parker Elizabeth Graham Roxy, Ghost Befriender kyle/404 leila David Dimitrov zclone tyler
    108 replies 1,381 retweets 7,979 likes
      1. adam koebel‏Verified account @skinnyghost Apr 29

        Excuse me I speak otaku let me order your sushi yakuza style onegaishimasu

        1 reply 0 retweets 42 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Proud Greg‏ @weebsarenthuman Apr 29
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Weebs have officially taken over Japanese culture

        0 replies 2 retweets 33 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
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      1. New conversation
      2. Piffweggy‏ @Yoggerino Apr 29
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I thought the onion was supposed to be fake?

        1 reply 2 retweets 20 likes
      3. 1 more reply
      1. New conversation
      2. なさい。‏ @threadsonsghost Apr 29
        Replying to @TheOnion

        ok from now on i am a 23 year old white american male

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Matthew Buell‏ @MBuell01 Apr 29
        Replying to @threadsonsghost @TheOnion

        Welcome to the team! We meet on Thursdays. You're privilege card will be arriving in the mail within the next 7-10 business days.

        1 reply 0 retweets 4 likes
      4. ViewtfulHero‏ @ViewtfulHero Apr 29
        Replying to @MBuell01 @threadsonsghost @TheOnion

        You get a yellow card for mixing up "your" and "you're" 😗

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      5. Mike‏ @mikeavent Apr 29
        Replying to @ViewtfulHero @MBuell01 and

        racist

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      6. なさい。‏ @threadsonsghost Apr 30
        Replying to @mikeavent @ViewtfulHero and

        i am so confused rn

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
      7. End of conversation
      1. C. Gold‏ @AlchemicalGold Apr 29
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Weebs btfo.

        0 replies 1 retweet 4 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Paul O'Keeffe‏ @Back2Bataan Apr 29
        Replying to @TheOnion

        " The report further confirmed that virtually 100 percent of this demographic is either currently dating or recently broke up with a woman named Miku." I thought it was Akiko ?

        0 replies 0 retweets 10 likes
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      1. Jacket47‏ @firebat47 Apr 29
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Since when did the Onion start reporting facts.

        0 replies 1 retweet 4 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. ➳ Yang Ventures ➳‏ @YangVentures Apr 30
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Hey, that's like Whole Foods' customer demographic! :)

        1 reply 0 retweets 8 likes
      3. ミスター ウルフ | Misutā Urufu‏ @MisutaaUrufu May 1
        Replying to @YangVentures @TheOnion

        The whole Whole Foods demographic? Or just partially Whole Foods?

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. ➳ Yang Ventures ➳‏ @YangVentures May 1
        Replying to @MisutaaUrufu @TheOnion

        Bad joke about the Yellow Fever restaurant at Whole Foods.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      5. ミスター ウルフ | Misutā Urufu‏ @MisutaaUrufu May 1
        Replying to @YangVentures @TheOnion

        I just saw the opportunity to make a pun :u

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      6. ➳ Yang Ventures ➳‏ @YangVentures May 1
        Replying to @MisutaaUrufu @TheOnion

        Oy, went right over my head!

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      7. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. (((LISP Coder)))  🦠 🦟Space Force Elongated Muskrat‏ @compbiobryan Apr 29
        Replying to @TheOnion

        22歳から24歳ぐらいの時は丁度日本語/英語翻訳の仕事をやっていました。その時に妻に出逢った。日本人女との恋愛について警告したい。ただ白人男のお金と遺伝子を貰いたくて、相手も自分と同じく人間魂を持っていると認識できない。特に外人も人間だと認めない。 ようやく、子供を日本へ誘拐する。

        2 replies 1 retweet 5 likes
      3. (((LISP Coder)))  🦠 🦟Space Force Elongated Muskrat‏ @compbiobryan Apr 29
        Replying to @compbiobryan @TheOnion

        I think it's great that they perfectly chose the age at which my Japanese was at its best.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. (((LISP Coder)))  🦠 🦟Space Force Elongated Muskrat‏ @compbiobryan Apr 29
        Replying to @compbiobryan @TheOnion

        After the financial crash, I mostly used Japanese to fight with my wife. Now that she's taken off with my kids, I barely use it at all.

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      5. Tweet unavailable
      6. (((LISP Coder)))  🦠 🦟Space Force Elongated Muskrat‏ @compbiobryan Apr 30
        Replying to @factor_ko @TheOnion

        Thank you.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      7. End of conversation

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