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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Apr 28

    23AndMe Forensic Kit Informs Customer What Crimes He’s Committed https://trib.al/nTedj8D pic.twitter.com/cqAdlZxf2b

    12:33 PM - 28 Apr 2018
    • 271 Retweets
    • 1,258 Likes
    • RJ h3RE 🇦🇲 AJ Marc & Kringle Seth Lachner Evey Shannon Merget Loxley Locksmith Douglas Pynn
    18 replies 271 retweets 1,258 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Jacklemore™‏ @jokeyweisguy Apr 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @wishuponaLAUR

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. jumpin' jack flash‏ @wishuponaLAUR Apr 28
        Replying to @jokeyweisguy @TheOnion

        I am loving this

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Dr. Ann‏ @AnnChildersMD Apr 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        How about the crimes he will commit? (Minority Report: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0181689/ …)

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      3. 1 more reply
      1.  🧟‍♀️ 🧠 👽 👻 💀 👹‏ @noswalanoif Apr 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @sclementines lolol

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. New conversation
      2. Dustin Rogers‏ @revdustinrogers Apr 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @matty

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. 1 more reply
      1. NeauregardForIdiots‏ @PelDrell Apr 29
        Replying to @TheOnion @Wonder0_oWoman

        Is this the same kit that law enforcement used to catch that serial killer? Hard pass.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. G Smitty‏ @Thebigguy360 Apr 29
        Replying to @TheOnion

        And whether or not he should give them jobs in his White House....pic.twitter.com/lVjpelW59O

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Richard Moore‏ @moore3t1 Apr 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Somebody get a sample of Trump's DNA to send in! Perhaps a waiter at Mar-a-Lago could be recruited.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Sean Mitchell‏ @sean_m_mitch Apr 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Thank God I took an Ancestry test! Don’t want anyone hearing about my extensive record.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Chris T.‏ @TweeterAudioGuy Apr 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @Tveitbakk

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. John Bonini‏ @JohnBonini Apr 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @MsSapone Your tweet was juxtaposed to this one. 🔪

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. gothamfoodie‏ @gothamfoodie Apr 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @MakeOurEscape LOL

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Gur Gosal‏ @guresmax1 Apr 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        don't know why I read "foreskin kit".

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. bil willard‏ @WillardDunn Apr 28
        Replying to @TheOnion @MrJonCryer

        don’t beleive this story

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Future King of Umpapa Mao Mao‏ @Pondering1derer Apr 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        😂

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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