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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Apr 13

    Woman Spends Entire Date Wondering If This The One She’ll Mace https://trib.al/IfSKS02 pic.twitter.com/8lLPhRfkZ6

    9:26 AM - 13 Apr 2018
    • 234 Retweets
    • 1,663 Likes
    • drippy Jess & Jen Sarah Randoolf lindsay spellman Brandon Miller Daniel Bates Tariiiiiii Rick f kerryHanley
    20 replies 234 retweets 1,663 likes
      1. NeAndrewThal‏ @PeakHunting Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Resting mace face

        0 replies 1 retweet 9 likes
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      1. Satoshi Revolution‏ @CATA_coin Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/Z7sJEOkF7B

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. George Lancaster‏ @lancaster1027 Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Dang! Where'd "is" run off to?

        1 reply 0 retweets 3 likes
      3. 1 more reply
      1. Vote November, 6th‏ @laurenpricemil2 Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I’m drinking a cup of coffee and literally something happened with my nose and the coffe when I read this because I started laughing

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. Bill Parks‏ @HemiBParks Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I used to tell dates they didn't need to worry if I was an axe murderer, I'm more of the chainsaw type

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. Stephanie‏ @stecky87 Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        . . . I thought this was supposed to be a joke paper 😭

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Edgar‏ @mcdaddyissues91 Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @markabaigar

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Myrddraal‏ @HandOfTheDark Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/qOqiHRqulm

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1.  🎃Marcus Cadaverport 👻‏ @john_siglerr Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @KTplz_

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. WorkChic‏ @Workchic Apr 14
        Replying to @TheOnion @dana_debanks

        lol

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Rogerdisagrees‏ @Rodger_disagree Apr 14
        Replying to @TheOnion

        #Rogerdisagrees. Nowadays it's "Wondering WHEN she'll get to mace + sue for harassment".

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. William Rory Coker‏ @CokerRory Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Story of my life.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Ragnar‏ @Riskarr5 Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Must be a feminist.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Ed Beagle‏ @epbeagle420 Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Proofreader Strike goes into second week!!!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Andrew Dykeman‏ @ADinNYC36 Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I love the Onion! Writers are geniuses!!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Clarity‏ @plerf Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        No mace=no misdemeanor

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Mike Gargano‏ @mgargano Apr 13
        Replying to @TheOnion

        🤞🏻

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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