REPORT: New Study Shows Thoughts And Prayers Leading Cause of Death in North America
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"'Ever since the invention of mass tragedy, thoughts and prayers have risen extensively, almost rampantly, without regulation or restriction, leading to an unprecedented, and frankly, preventable amount of deaths.' the report concludes."
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Onion’s losing its job to real news. No joke can compare to reality nowadays.
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My family always celebrates the holidays with a good ole shooting. There's only a few of us left, now, so it only helps us even more cherish the memories of those we killed.
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I bet the NRA are kicking themselves for not coming up with such an awesome line. Oy vey the line between reality and satire is blurry indeed.
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Had to look twice. At first I thought the article was from Breitbart
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The Onion isn't even satire anymore at this point.
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Damn you Onion I thought this was like a random legitimate news headline make things more fake!
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It's becoming clear based on the feed back that the reason the NRA is freaking out is because most wouldn't pass a mental health back ground check.
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Amazingly, this is almost exactly what the NRA said IRL.
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Honestly wouldn't be surprised if Marco Rubio said this next. Try harder, Onion.
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This headline is about three minutes away from becoming true...
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Hopefully the people close to you can be as lucky.
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Nothing says bonding like banning others with opposing views from speaking.
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Oof. With your frustrations, I'm almost convinced you were the one that was shot at.
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I believe that in the gay community he is known as a "bear" ...maybe that has something to do with his right to bear arms, I dunno
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The way he shows that sign who's boss kinda makes me horny.
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We all know how in style the MAGA hat is. Such a turn on!
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I'm flattered.
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And ignorant.
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