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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

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Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Mar 6

    Study: U.S. Wastes 2 Million Hours Annually Figuring Out Where Tape Roll Starts https://trib.al/ziUfvq6 pic.twitter.com/VfVdyZqSCz

    7:30 PM - 6 Mar 2018
    • 2,045 Retweets
    • 9,179 Likes
    • Gunnar Carlson Juliet Matthew Horvath Kristina Ramirez Wilson, EdD Witch-ney Brains G lukas olsson Hercule Poirot Christopher Price
    96 replies 2,045 retweets 9,179 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Steve Ohnesorge WBTV‏Verified account @WBTVSteveO Mar 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        And where the saran wrap starts too...

        2 replies 0 retweets 14 likes
      3. Emily Miller  🌈‏ @EmilyRB Mar 6
        Replying to @WBTVSteveO @TheOnion

        Fold the edge under. Works like a charm!

        2 replies 0 retweets 10 likes
      4. Patrick‏ @PatrickInNC Mar 6
        Replying to @EmilyRB @WBTVSteveO @TheOnion

        And which way the bread bag tie goes.

        1 reply 0 retweets 8 likes
      5. Steve Ohnesorge WBTV‏Verified account @WBTVSteveO Mar 6
        Replying to @PatrickInNC @EmilyRB @TheOnion

        Just like when your hands are full as you walk to your door...the keys are always in the other pocket. Always. .

        0 replies 0 retweets 8 likes
      6. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Nathan Flurry‏ @NathanFlurry Mar 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Can we factcheck this? 22 seconds per citizen seems a bit low.

        1 reply 0 retweets 9 likes
      3. Nathan Flurry‏ @NathanFlurry Mar 6
        Replying to @NathanFlurry @TheOnion

        Hmm, well if only people of ages 15-64 use tape rolls (which is 66.5% of the population) then that number would still only be 33.5 seconds.

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      4. JSF001‏ @JSF0011 Mar 7
        Replying to @NathanFlurry @TheOnion

        As soon as I read the headline I started thinking of the math, and that despite being the onion it wasn't satire because it was very plausible and actually quite likely higher.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      5. End of conversation
      1. Party Time Conservative‏ @RealLucVNO Mar 6
        Replying to @TheOnion @CHSommers

        This might not actually be a joke....

        0 replies 0 retweets 13 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
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      1. New conversation
      2. Mary Hilton‏ @FMHilton Mar 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Followed by 1 million hours trying to find the start of the bathroom tissue, and looking for that other sock.

        1 reply 0 retweets 4 likes
      3. ArtDesignMusic‏ @Wonderwoman1fan Mar 6
        Replying to @FMHilton @TheOnion

        The start of the Saran wrap is really bad😂

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. Jacky North‏ @jackynorth1 Mar 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        The struggle is real

        0 replies 0 retweets 7 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Jonathan Link‏ @JonLinkPhD Mar 6
        Replying to @TheOnion @harry__miley

        What’s funny is The Onion thinks this is a joke.

        0 replies 0 retweets 11 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
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      1. Thick Lizzy is too silly to be spoopy!‏ @ThickLizzy Mar 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        FOLD OVER THE END PPL!!!

        0 replies 0 retweets 8 likes
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      1. piggie‏ @StanloGraphics Mar 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        ive personally contributed about 2 million hours of that

        0 replies 0 retweets 8 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. OniLinkPlus‏ @OniLinkPlus Mar 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        That's an average of about 24 minutes per year per person. That's... actually not an unreasonable estimate.

        1 reply 0 retweets 10 likes
      3. Kirby‏ @KirbyTheBlue Mar 6
        Replying to @OniLinkPlus @TheOnion

        Wouldn't it be 24 seconds?

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      4. OniLinkPlus‏ @OniLinkPlus Mar 6
        Replying to @KirbyTheBlue @TheOnion

        Oops, you're exactly right.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      5. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. ✇ᴘᴀᴛʀɪᴄᴋ✇  🎃 💀‏ @patrickdfoy Mar 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Come on @TheOnion I thought you were supposed to be fake news

        1 reply 0 retweets 10 likes
      3. 1 more reply
      1. New conversation
      2. Lex Watson‏ @Lex_WattZ Mar 6
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Just fold it over where ya teared it last ya pantywaste.

        1 reply 0 retweets 3 likes
      3. Hockeyhi765‏ @Hockeyhi765 Mar 6
        Replying to @Lex_WattZ @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/mBTmViKLFU

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation

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