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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Feb 28

    Warm, Syrupy Pleasure Coursing Through Man’s Veins After Big Hit Of Mattress https://trib.al/4hvbO8N pic.twitter.com/oX9Ck26Fsk

    8:35 PM - 28 Feb 2018
    • 1,073 Retweets
    • 4,911 Likes
    • David Wovchko ⎉ Thomas Robinson Eileen Uphold Le Guinian Thought Emily Borhi Fetish Sorcerer Raquelita ☭ueer Abhinav Suri
    24 replies 1,073 retweets 4,911 likes
      1. Peter Gallagher‏ @HandsomePeteMN Feb 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        And the snooze button when you think you're done, pure ecstasy

        0 replies 0 retweets 9 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
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      1. New conversation
      2. Connor McLoughlin‏ @connor_mclough Mar 1
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @Emmalillian4 😂

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Emma Champagne‏ @Emmalillian4 Mar 1
        Replying to @connor_mclough @TheOnion

        😂😂😂 that is you

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      4. Connor McLoughlin‏ @connor_mclough Mar 1
        Replying to @Emmalillian4 @TheOnion

        Im not gonna deny it 💁🏻‍♂️

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      5. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2.  ✊2the Hill‏ @2the_hill Feb 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        His feet 👀 big

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Cody Clark‏ @CodyClark256 Mar 1
        Replying to @2the_hill @TheOnion

        lol I wonder why they're photoshopped. What did this stock photo of a man have to hide?

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      4.  ✊2the Hill‏ @2the_hill Mar 1
        Replying to @CodyClark256 @TheOnion

        🤔🤔 exhaustion from 🤥🤥maybe 💭

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      5. End of conversation
      1. Vincent Zhang‏ @Vincent_Zhang31 Feb 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Mattress, not even once.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Dweeb Destroyer‏ @dome_chompsky Feb 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @_beck_me that good stuff

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Neelou Goodarzi‏ @NeelouGoodarzi Feb 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @BradyHartung can we PLEASE USE THIS

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Noah Albrecht‏ @nwmngly Feb 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Mmm that’s me right now

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1.  ✨‏ @babykrets Feb 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @bpolisighd

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. New conversation
      2. Andrew Hornstra‏ @AndrewHornstra Feb 28
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @topazandmaddy

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Madeleine Wattenberg‏ @topazandmaddy Feb 28
        Replying to @AndrewHornstra @TheOnion

        Not again

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. Andrew Hornstra‏ @AndrewHornstra Feb 28
        Replying to @topazandmaddy @TheOnion

        Your theory seems more and more plausible.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      5. Madeleine Wattenberg‏ @topazandmaddy Feb 28
        Replying to @AndrewHornstra @TheOnion

        This one is literally about the bed under which the staff writer is living

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      6. Andrew Hornstra‏ @AndrewHornstra Feb 28
        Replying to @topazandmaddy @TheOnion

        This was in direct response to your tweet yesterday.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      7. End of conversation
      1. Calvin Ware‏ @TheDenimHustler Mar 1
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Me. I can't retweet this enough

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. season‏ @see_zn Mar 1
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Pajamagasm

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Tricky‏ @ThatDearGuy Mar 1
        Replying to @TheOnion @401authrequired

        Short but good. :D

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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