Skip to content
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • Moments Moments Moments, current page.

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
Verified account
@TheOnion

Tweets

The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

Tweets

  • © 2018 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Feb 27

    Relationship At Point Where Woman Has To Learn Boyfriend’s Family’s Weird Card Games https://trib.al/y0AkFyg pic.twitter.com/1xNWzfII6Z

    6:07 PM - 27 Feb 2018
    • 338 Retweets
    • 2,636 Likes
    • Memphis Deal Finder all🎃y Liam 🌙freya🎃 Matt Frischer Pierre-Simon Laplace Sheila Fox Miller Cassidy Chassagne Klein
    34 replies 338 retweets 2,636 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Marybeth Horn‏ @MarybethHorn6 Feb 27
        Replying to @TheOnion

        EUCHRE. However can't be partners ever since aunt once stabbed uncle with a fork. LOL

        2 replies 0 retweets 6 likes
      3. Sarah E. Holmes  🏳️‍🌈‏ @SarahtheHolmes Feb 27
        Replying to @MarybethHorn6 @TheOnion

        You think it's a joke but I never get angrier than when a euchre game goes poorly. 😤

        2 replies 0 retweets 5 likes
      4. Euchre Info‏ @EuchreInfo Feb 27
        Replying to @SarahtheHolmes @MarybethHorn6 @TheOnion

        How do you know the Euchre game is over? When someone walks away ticked.pic.twitter.com/YdpspRAwvf

        1 reply 0 retweets 4 likes
      5. Marybeth Horn‏ @MarybethHorn6 Feb 27
        Replying to @EuchreInfo @SarahtheHolmes @TheOnion

        When someone gets stabbed in the hand with a fork, the game is over. LOL

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      6. Euchre Info‏ @EuchreInfo Feb 27
        Replying to @MarybethHorn6 @SarahtheHolmes @TheOnion

        ROFL

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      7. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. 181818‏ @1818gse Feb 27
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @Matt16horst @MadsConner reminded me of y'all and Hearts haha

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      3. Matt Horst‏ @Matt16horst Feb 27
        Replying to @1818gse @TheOnion @MadsConner

        Awwww damn haha

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. Dan Cramer‏ @daniel_cramer Feb 27
        Replying to @TheOnion

        If you're from the upper Midwest it's euchre

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Emily Curtis‏ @emweecurt Feb 27
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @navzam we made you learn pitch from day one

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Nafis Zaman‏ @navzam Feb 28
        Replying to @emweecurt @TheOnion

        And I finally understood it on year six

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. Robert‏ @robertcollette8 Feb 27
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @tag0798 Reminds me of when you taught me those card games.

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Bailey Brinker‏ @BaileyFBrinker Feb 27
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @court_owens I mean, I love game nights with the Owens' but your fella better have a competitive streak, otherwise he'll get left in the dust.

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Courtney Owens‏ @court_owens Feb 27
        Replying to @BaileyFBrinker @BaileyPage3 @TheOnion

        hahaha oh yeah he will definitely need to be able to hold his ground

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. Obbie705‏ @acrazedhorse Feb 27
        Replying to @TheOnion

        "Bring your quarters bitch" said area grandmother

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Phil‏ @filetczar Feb 27
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @KevinMurphy_STL

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Just Dave‏ @oyitsdave Feb 27
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @Most_Dope_Cope @melodypeplinski

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Steve Roth‏ @SRoth0508 Feb 27
        Replying to @TheOnion

        could be worse - Twister with the BFs parents, for example..

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Troy Androli‏ @AndroliTroy Feb 27
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Playing 500 is a must in my family.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo

    Loading seems to be taking a while.

    Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

      Promoted Tweet

      false

      • © 2018 Twitter
      • About
      • Help Center
      • Terms
      • Privacy policy
      • Cookies
      • Ads info