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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Feb 16

    "I’m just a humble lightweight, semi-automatic rifle; I never expected this kind of outpouring of affection." https://trib.al/EFdYQEX pic.twitter.com/8UEvhQVrs3

    9:22 AM - 16 Feb 2018
    • 6,246 Retweets
    • 15,235 Likes
    • Doctor Snyder Asta Wylie yikes bruh Alex Kacija Heather Collins Samuel Douglas Platypus a Day Neil Rowling クァイエット(Quiet)
    96 replies 6,246 retweets 15,235 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. John Barron‏ @Austin_R_Porter Feb 16
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Treat guns like cars? Cars are an American tradition that we love... that happen to be dangerous. Regulation and safety have not destroyed car industry yet have saved many lives. - age limits - test for license - license levels - can revoke licenses - regulate sales/registration

        7 replies 7 retweets 46 likes
      3. Max Charles‏ @shamusjack13 Feb 16
        Replying to @Austin_R_Porter @TheOnion

        And yet many people disobey all those laws and continue to drive without licenses, drunk, underage, etc..

        7 replies 1 retweet 9 likes
      4. Scott Butterworth‏Verified account @Butterwomp Feb 16
        Replying to @shamusjack13 @Austin_R_Porter @TheOnion

        "People break laws, so why have any!" That's some real cosmic brain shit right there, man.

        2 replies 4 retweets 88 likes
      5. Max Charles‏ @shamusjack13 Feb 16
        Replying to @Butterwomp @Austin_R_Porter @TheOnion

        That wasn’t my argument. You can ban and put laws on lots of things and it won’t solve problems. It’s not a real solution.

        5 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
      6. CraftSnekRyo‏ @RiverWitchRyo Feb 16
        Replying to @shamusjack13 @Butterwomp and

        Now you're just proving his point. Shit will always happen, there are no perfect "real" solutions. But laws help a little bit, it might not save every life taken by a gun if we restrict them, but it damn well might save some lives. And isn't that worth trying?

        1 reply 0 retweets 33 likes
      7. Max Charles‏ @shamusjack13 Feb 16
        Replying to @RiverWitchRyo @Butterwomp and

        What’s the end goal? To reduce this specific crime? Mass shootings right? Which person who has decided to plan this event is going to follow these rules? Do we limit the amount of ammo one can buy? Do we ban all guns or just certain ones? Which laws would work?

        7 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
      8. CraftSnekRyo‏ @RiverWitchRyo Feb 16
        Replying to @shamusjack13 @Butterwomp and

        I don't believe in banning guns, my father and a lot of other people are hunters. But for I think that having stricter control on guns is important. Do background checks and have people get a licence before being allowed to use a gun to show they can handle it safely.

        2 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
      9. Max Charles‏ @shamusjack13 Feb 16
        Replying to @RiverWitchRyo @Butterwomp and

        I’m of the opinion that there should be an extremely high standard for gun ownership, especially concealed and open carry, but nobody listens to me.

        3 replies 0 retweets 6 likes
      10. 1 more reply
      1. New conversation
      2. real‏ @762100rdDrums Feb 16
        Replying to @TheOnion

        If I was to stare at a gun how long would it take for it to shoot me without anyone touching it ?

        3 replies 2 retweets 16 likes
      3. JoiningUnrelatedDots‏ @Mareeswj Feb 16
        Replying to @762100rdDrums @TheOnion

        JoiningUnrelatedDots Retweeted Hanna E

        https://twitter.com/hh__000000/status/964551078648872960?ref_src=twcamp%5Eshare%7Ctwsrc%5Em5%7Ctwgr%5Eemail%7Ctwcon%5E7046%7Ctwterm%5E3 …

        JoiningUnrelatedDots added,

        Hanna E @lil__intro_vert
        Replying to @TheOnion
        And in its closing speech, the AR-15 concluded with "I don't kill people. People kill people." :')
        0 replies 2 retweets 23 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. Jason Hornbuckle‏ @JasonHornbuckle Feb 16
        Replying to @TheOnion

        you guys are really boring on this. if you can't do something funny just move on to the next thing

        5 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
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      1. New conversation
      2. Rex T‏ @rexdbr1 Feb 16
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Those of us who served know the damage to squishy humans by auto fire. Even small caliber at that muzzle velocity (ke= .5 mass × velocity squared) has no place in public. I grieve for these kids and their parents.

        2 replies 0 retweets 33 likes
      3. Mx. Gael G‏ @darogadaae Feb 16
        Replying to @rexdbr1 @TheOnion

        I can appreciate that. Coming from a military family, I understand the 2A mindset, but even my Marine grandfather agreed that like... maybe we should have *some* restrictions for firearms purchases. At least untol the Fox Rot started really eating into him.

        0 replies 0 retweets 10 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Polly Hill‏ @PollyHashmi Feb 16
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Is it really satire if it’s true???

        1 reply 1 retweet 17 likes
      3. 1 more reply
      1. New conversation
      2. Hanna E‏ @lil__intro_vert Feb 16
        Replying to @TheOnion

        And in its closing speech, the AR-15 concluded with "I don't kill people. People kill people." :')

        3 replies 1 retweet 31 likes
      3. 2 more replies
      1.  👻TurnBOOlet 🎃 (Votes & Hates Nazis)‏ @turnbullet666 Feb 16
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn

        0 replies 0 retweets 38 likes
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