Oh my lord too REAL with me today Onion
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Probably bought by Jennifer, "Call me Jenny or someday stepmom, lol!", who could be dad's daughter, smells like a bottle of SpellBound exploded on her and couldn't keep a job if her life or iPhone X depended on it. I so hate her.
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When did the Onion start writing real stuff?
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You guys do the "dads don't know what they're doing" single parent joke too often.
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That is way better than gun humor
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I had this memory nicely repressed until I read this. Thanks
@TheOnion.
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At our dad's house, we always got the little camping boxes of cereal!
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Buy my cereal Awkwords. The cereal w/ letters that let you drown your troubles in milk. Lightly frosted with sarcasm to fuel your thoughts.
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Must've been Oreos cereal dad figured he could put his son on :S
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Too real.
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Oof. That’s... that’s closer to home than usual.
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A bowl of Tide pods and bleach
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Life cream lol
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I feel like divorce is a major theme for The Onion.
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Moldy Crunch: it tastes just like the basement!!!
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“ Dad said Candy was stopping by later. She’s a dancer or something and we like need to take care of her for a night or 2. He says I’ll like her.”
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Dark.
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