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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion Jan 17

    Goldfish Dying To Be Petted Just Once https://trib.al/3XTNUrv pic.twitter.com/Sf59QpPLUY

    3:55 PM - 17 Jan 2018
    • 339 Retweets
    • 1,819 Likes
    • Evelyn Goessling Ethan Gershgorin cameron Ocean Man 🧜🏼‍♀️ রাহু গ্রাস Denisa Pierre-Simon Laplace Michael Rabinowitz Ben 🇺🇸 (It’s not Halloween yet)
    17 replies 339 retweets 1,819 likes
      1. valkyrie‏ @crystarius Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        :( this kinda makes me sad

        0 replies 0 retweets 12 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. SalPal‏ @Sally2cotter Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @KevDawg47 squidward is still dying for my touch

        2 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
      3. Kevin 'Nines' Chambers‏ @KevDawg47 Jan 17
        Replying to @Sally2cotter @TheOnion

        He lives in Durfee! Anytime you can pet him

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. julie‏ @juliexmunoz Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @merdizzzle Uncle Sam hahaha

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      3. Merm‏ @merdizzzle Jan 17
        Replying to @juliexmunoz @TheOnion

        hahah RIP little buddy

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. Lauren Lynne‏ @LaurenLynne2359 Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @MikeHricik

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. Dimeji Babalola 🇳🇬‏ @dimejibabalola Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I thought this was a tide pod branded goldfish snack tbh

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. lindsey  👻‏ @LindseyLickteig Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @hansenconnor

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. bad lad‏ @DJ_HARD_DIK Jan 18
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Reminder to NEVER put fish in a bowl like that, they're not a fucking plant, give them some room

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Lyn Blackie‏ @LynBlackie Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I patted him the last time he swam by, but he forgot! #nomemoryretention

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. ViiStar‏ @VIIStar_ Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        So stop swimming away from my finger and let me love you!

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Greg Dober‏ @GJDober Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I have 40 of them in my pond and its frozen. They will have to wait until spring now.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Trump Eats Puppies‏ @666satansass666 Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        They're delicious!

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. John B‏ @BDaddy1967 Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/3B2Zyb4Hze

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Rex Banner‏ @Inspectjavert Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Just put your finger in the bowl, just the tip (gigity) and he'll nip it, that counts as a pet.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Josh J. Labuschagne‏ @illiadarden Jan 18
        Replying to @TheOnion

        *pet*

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1.  🎃Spooky Space Snek 💀‏ @Larping_idiot Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I know the feels.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. ask No for whom the bell tolls  ↗️‏ @NoBuddyNow Jan 17
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Oh no D:

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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