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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

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Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 10 Dec 2017

    Can You Hapless Fuckwits At Least Handle An Omelette?pic.twitter.com/7uW93NcZkw

    11:00 AM - 10 Dec 2017
    • 775 Retweets
    • 2,441 Likes
    • C̴̝͑a̵͙͆r̷͙̔ǫ̵̐l̸̝̄ ̴̱́M̶̤̂i̸̝̿ĺ̶̤l̶̨̓e̶̩̕r̵̲͛ Rogue_rabite :3 Randy Magnum 👻 chelsey ʕ*̫͡*ʕ。oO 🎃🕷️GHOSTLY CHRIS🕸️👻 Chaos Refilwe Productivity PLOW Theodosus
    78 replies 775 retweets 2,441 likes
      1. Paulie Sigh‏ @Paulie_Sigh 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        This woman deserves a cooking show on the Food Network ASAP. I would never miss an episode.

        0 replies 1 retweet 40 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Danette | the real horrors are movie critics‏ @danzotweets 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        instructions unclear; dick stuck in egg, currently seasoning it

        1 reply 0 retweets 32 likes
      3. 1 more reply
      1. Joshy(blogz)...tweetz‏ @JoshyTweetz 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        She seems nice!!

        0 replies 0 retweets 13 likes
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      1. amdew2‏ @theReal_amdew2 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        OMFG...!!! This had me on the floor. Funniest thing I’ve seen this week..... #mustsee

        0 replies 1 retweet 3 likes
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      1. 𝒟𝒥 𝒞𝑜𝓁𝓁𝒾𝒸𝓉  🌍 #𝒢𝒯𝒯𝒪‏ @DJCollict 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Wait... too fast... how did the 'bowl' get onto the 'stove' and have a flames under it? Also why does the 'bowl' look different there?

        0 replies 0 retweets 10 likes
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      1. David Gonzales‏ @DavidGo59034288 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        The title card with the annoyed plate toss is my favorite part.

        0 replies 0 retweets 6 likes
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      1. Ian Lisko‏ @FoundOgle 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Marry me angry chef lady 💗

        0 replies 0 retweets 5 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Paul Bateman‏ @PaulRMQ 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Haha @GlitterGeekGirl @Thessilian :)

        1 reply 0 retweets 3 likes
      3. Georgina Kamsika‏ @Thessilian 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @PaulRMQ @TheOnion @GlitterGeekGirl

        Perfect!

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. Bob Smith‏ @FriedLemur 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @hotdogsladies

        Just like grandma used to make.

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
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      1. Kaq1979‏ @kaq1979 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        God bless you The Onion

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Brian F. Kelcey‏ @stateofthecity 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        It's not as easy as she says! It years when you fold it over!! 😣

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Brian F. Kelcey‏ @stateofthecity 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @stateofthecity @TheOnion

        Tears, dammit

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. Dani_ Dire‏ @DaniKelly84 11 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Please make this into a long running series.

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. Jonas Sveningsson‏ @oneroom 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @hotdogsladies

        I don’t get it. Is the onion at the end part of the recipe?

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. Justin Jacobs‏ @justinjacobs 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @hotdogsladies

        This is exactly how I need recipes explained to me.

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. Hamza Shargabee 🐝‏ @icHamza 10 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        This is the most bitter thing I've ever seen

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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