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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 5 Dec 2017

    ‘I’ll Have To Obstruct One Last Thing,’ Whispers Jared Kushner Before Wrapping Gloved Hands Around Mueller’s Neck https://trib.al/ctbDQVt pic.twitter.com/mlYenmisii

    10:21 AM - 5 Dec 2017
    • 657 Retweets
    • 2,748 Likes
    • 💀 Max ScareCromeo 💀 Dr. Susan Key ash ✨ sillyg0053 Rosieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Richard Marquez Darren Nick Schoppy Bobbi Bestram
    27 replies 657 retweets 2,748 likes
      1. Berry‏ @WeWillBerryYou 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        He wouldn’t need gloves. He could leave half his scalp at the crime scene and Sean Hannity would still defend the admin lol

        0 replies 1 retweet 19 likes
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      1. Steven Martens‏ @StevenMartens23 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        He's not smart enough to wear gloves.

        0 replies 0 retweets 27 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. BrotherEJ‏ @Brother3j 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Bob would snap him like a twig lol

        1 reply 0 retweets 12 likes
      3. Eric Muirhead‏ @emuirhead 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @Brother3j @TheOnion

        Marine, Army ranger and decorated Vietnam war veteran.

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      4. Heidtman‏ @heidtman 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @emuirhead @Brother3j @TheOnion

        vs wimp, pampered milquetoast, glamor twit.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      5. End of conversation
      1. Bloofeh‏ @Bloofeh 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Commit treason in new Ivanka Trump brand black gloves!

        1 reply 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. EDDY Rules The NPC Abyss‏ @ejosh1 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        You know what is kinda weird about this? there are literally dozens of dead people who can be connected to the Clintons, and i have never seen anything close to this bit of satire about it.

        0 replies 1 retweet 1 like
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      1. Beto For Senate!!!!‏ @TherealCharvey 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        What's funny is everyone knows that Jared couldn't fight his way out of a wet paper bag.

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. The Angry Liberal‏ @angryandliberal 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Mueller would give Kushner an atomic wedgie with his gold-stitched Spongebob Underoos.

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
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      1. Janice‏ @Boomerbabe3 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Trump would have done it himself, but his hands are too small.

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. NovemberLincoln‏ @NovemberLincoln 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Jared does not have the grip nor the upper body strength to strangle anyone.

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      3. 1 more reply
      1. Jim Murphy‏ @MurphInCA 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I’ll take the Marine Vietnam hero over the pencil-neck debutante any day

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. John Drover‏ @JohnDrover 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @steaks

        I’ll buy a ticket to that eventual Hollywood movie.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. David Olson‏ @DavidAOlson1 5 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @allahpundit

        My money is on the old man.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Get Some!‏ @PashmanAndrew 9 Dec 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Seriously, this is hilarious!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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