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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

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Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 24 Nov 2017

    42 Million Dead In Bloodiest Black Friday Weekend On Record https://trib.al/ISoZ1IZ pic.twitter.com/IFsI2p8FBI

    12:45 PM - 24 Nov 2017
    • 1,197 Retweets
    • 3,270 Likes
    • Park Slope PLOW Barbara Procida Digital Warble Patrick Bryant hayden HaY-LeE Allison Fernandez NY Yankees Apologist Streetlight Effect
    62 replies 1,197 retweets 3,270 likes
      1. Ryan Doell‏ @RyanDoell31 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Thoughts and prayers

        0 replies 2 retweets 25 likes
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      1. Oniraptor ™️‏ @0NlRAPTOR 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        if only the herd could be thin so easily.

        0 replies 1 retweet 21 likes
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      1. Scary (99.9% dead) Comrade‏ @The7thComrade 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Thought this was real for a second. Jesus I need to pay attention

        0 replies 0 retweets 44 likes
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      1. *gunshot noise* yuh‏ @yugiohgod69 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        one day this is going to actually happen

        0 replies 0 retweets 7 likes
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      1. Michael Jackson‏ @whyassume 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        And in related news ... The average IQ in USA has ticked up 3 points.

        0 replies 0 retweets 8 likes
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      1. Alex Neri‏ @AlexNeri__ 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        We will forever remember the fallen in this day of tragedy. I saved a lot of money on videogames though.

        0 replies 0 retweets 9 likes
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      1. John Lynch‏ @myremarksare 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Unlike the unbelievable bargains they sought, they shall be missed.

        0 replies 0 retweets 9 likes
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      1. JP‏ @jlpitts123 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Oh the humanity!pic.twitter.com/FXf3RdervI

        0 replies 1 retweet 2 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. thomas‏ @tomsuffel 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @North2North

        This is fake news

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Anthony O'Dea‏ @Anthony_ODea19 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @tomsuffel @TheOnion @North2North

        Yeah that's kind of what the Onion specializes in

        1 reply 0 retweets 5 likes
      4. Snarky Cyclist‏ @SnarkyCyclistAB 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @Anthony_ODea19 @tomsuffel and

        As does Breitbart.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      5. End of conversation
      1. DOOOOOM 🏳️‍🌈 🏳️‍🌈‏ @Croakinc36 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/38yodpZaxi

        0 replies 1 retweet 1 like
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      1. jurdubz‏ @quartzminor 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        42 million *brain dead

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
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      1. Soop Munkey‏ @soopmunkey 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        So. Much. Winning.

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
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      1. Tanner Anderson‏ @tanman11123 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @noahanderson25

        Damn. Combine that with all the window cleaners we lost today and that’s gotta be a US record

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. David Hawley‏ @DavidHawley2 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        So Trump’s base is gone then?

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Will Pacey‏ @pacey_will 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Shit that's scary

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Will Pacey‏ @pacey_will 24 Nov 2017
        Replying to @pacey_will @TheOnion

        Ok its not real I had to think about it

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
      4. End of conversation

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