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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 19 Nov 2017

    Report: 80% Of All Traffic Accidents Caused By Drivers Gawking At Shirtless Hunks https://trib.al/3xXjnhB pic.twitter.com/WFuZQgYmAf

    2:30 PM - 19 Nov 2017
    • 132 Retweets
    • 766 Likes
    • Newbeat Studios Angor Delicious Pierre-Simon Laplace Garrett Margaret27 Saville Katz nora o'reilly izzy Matthew R. Stover
    28 replies 132 retweets 766 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. jayden‏ @jaydenms1 19 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @AtomicAcidQueen

        Tbh that’d be the cause of my accidents

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Princess of the Dawn‏ @AtomicAcidQueen 19 Nov 2017
        Replying to @jaydenms1 @TheOnion

        I’d say same but like it’s winter in Finland rn

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      4. jayden‏ @jaydenms1 19 Nov 2017
        Replying to @AtomicAcidQueen @TheOnion

        I mean here too but like in general lmao

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      5. End of conversation
      1. death becomes her‏ @magicka111 19 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        AND THEY EXPECT US NOT TO STARE?!

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. bernoullis principle‏ @pavidham 19 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @asdfasdfghd

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. Thomas Ian Russell‏‏ @ThomasIanRusse5 19 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Just exactly what are you implying with these statistics buddy! Because women don't cause 80% of accidents & only 10% of men are gay, so....ARE YOU CALLING ME GAY? Look, just because he's gorgeous, in a plain type of way, doesn't mean I'm....Is he single?

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Thick Lizzy is too silly to be spoopy!‏ @ThickLizzy 19 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Look at the damage you're causing @yaegerman !

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Keith  🎃 🎃 🎃 Burton‏ @bbeekk321 19 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        If I had a dollar for every time this happened to me...

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. New conversation
      2. Chad‏ @Koifla 19 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        The Saab is clearly photoshopped.

        2 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      3. 1 more reply
      1. Slade‏ @Slade87338300 20 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Damn what am I doing in the corner of that photo

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Jeremy Edwards‏ @J_Roc1971 20 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        80%? Seems a little low doesn’t it?

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Alex Alewel‏ @aalewel 20 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/WYqNgxuyZK

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Nico Fuckin’ Bellic‏ @PorterPizzazz 20 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/qR4xZWvN7V

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Its_me_DBT‏ @DBTINC 20 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        only in San Fran ...

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Luke Morris‏ @lukemorris10 19 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        See no one believed those people who said women were dangerous drivers, well how silly do yous feel now! You have very reliable proof to back you up now 😂😂

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Octopus_Wrangler‏ @nightwing49456 19 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I believe it!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Adan Garcia‏ @Culalam 19 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Poor Saab.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Lord & Lady Douchebag, 14th&15th Angry Democrats 😡‏ @CHARleeTrauma 19 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Hello, ladies? My eyes 👀 are UP here! 😂 😂 😆pic.twitter.com/Yo8CeNl8Uu

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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