Skip to content
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • Moments Moments Moments, current page.

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
Verified account
@TheOnion

Tweets

The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

Tweets

  • © 2018 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 10 Nov 2017

    Intern Just Happens To Be Beautiful 22-Year-Old Woman https://trib.al/idVxBuX pic.twitter.com/qJiN13ufQM

    7:16 AM - 10 Nov 2017
    • 113 Retweets
    • 833 Likes
    • Luke Overfelt Berry Saurav Pathak 👻 ~spooky Red Sox fan~ 🎃 #WorldSeries2018 ⚾ Angor Delicious Pierre-Simon Laplace Marty tweet twidderton Astead
    13 replies 113 retweets 833 likes
      1. Spooky 🎃 Flirt Gamer‏ @NFlirtGamer 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I also empathize with the extremely attractive sexy 22 yo, for she is forever pigeon-holed as not really being qualified for the job, having only been hired for looks/body & not her ability. #DamnedifYouAreDamnedifYoureNot

        0 replies 2 retweets 8 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. r.‏ @fvckspeak 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        immigrants arent stealing our jobs, the beautiful are stealing our jobs!

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Ruthsaidwhat?‏ @rschiff40 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Hello middle-aged married lady’s nightmare 👋😱pic.twitter.com/h9RqJd3dd9

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Shawnito  🇺🇸‏ @PFShawns 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/GonfO7jF9l

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Midwestern Hedgie‏ @MidwestHedgie 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        LOL @BBeausir "Intern Just Happens to Be Handsome Tall White Guy"

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. EnufIsEnuf NoRapeyJudges‏ @teab35 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @MidwestHedgie @TheOnion @BBeausir

        Somehow that white, tall, handsome, young guy will rise to become VP one day, on the backs of experienced & knowledgeable women who get the work done.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. Midwestern Hedgie‏ @MidwestHedgie 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @teab35 @TheOnion @BBeausir

        You are being vastly optimistic about the number of women in our industry.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      5. EnufIsEnuf NoRapeyJudges‏ @teab35 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @MidwestHedgie @TheOnion @BBeausir

        I'm talking about my own industry (pharma/diagnostics) with lots of experienced, knowledgeable women. All men on top spots, though.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      6. End of conversation
      1. Milquetoast‏ @NoOphend 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Hilarious but didn't need the last line -- don't explain the obvious joke.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Outa Spacz‏ @openspacez 16 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @christynann4

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Progressives Aren't‏ @AchDuLibrtarian 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        And she only costs 78% as much as a man! Why would anyone hire men? #EqualPayDay

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. carrmania‏ @carrmania 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Meanwhile, ugly guys are discriminated against. Take back the office!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Remy‏ @RemyVorender 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Being attractive has its advantages.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Jebe the Arrow‏ @Mongol_Lawyer 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        beautiful women don't deserve jobs, amirite?

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Vincent Domeraski‏ @VD0meras 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Right, sexism is a bit more complicated than we would like to admit.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Phil the Eagle‏ @Online_Naysayer 10 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        This made my skin crawl. Great job haha.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo

    Loading seems to be taking a while.

    Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

      Promoted Tweet

      false

      • © 2018 Twitter
      • About
      • Help Center
      • Terms
      • Privacy policy
      • Cookies
      • Ads info