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Surely Carter Page is the new Messiah for hath he not turned a cracker into toast? #Sessions
Remember kids, if Carter Page has a Masters and a PhD, anyone can.
Stop being mean to the morally disabled!
He testifies like no one's watching.
Experts say it was a congenital, lifelong condition. #sad
it's not nice to pick on the disabled
When did the Onion become a legitimate news source? This seems 100% accurate
thoughts and prayers
THIS IS FUNNY BECAUSE WE KNOW HE IS GOING TO BE KILLED
I bet it was stupidcide.
Perhaps Page is the decoy, weaving up the road but stone cold sober, while his drunk buddies head off in the other direction.
BREAKING NEWS: UMA ABEDINE AND HILLARY CLINTON VIDEOS OF SCISSORING WHILE WATCHING ANTHONY WEINER CHILD PORN RELEASED TODAY.
"I'm not lost . . .not lost at all - nope."
@ryan12197 @marshallthewise This is BIG!!!
holy shit lmfao
COFFEE OUT MY NOSE
OUCH

I misread the headline and source and almost screamed involuntarily like a witch
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