Sent so many thoughts and prayers that I forgot where I put my keys.
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Is it still the Onion if it’s too real to be satire?
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Too soon to talk about assault weapons. Let’s wait for the next mass killing so we can delay again. Isn’t this madness?
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We should do away with the background checks altogether and have gun sellers start using thoughts and prayers to ensure public safety.
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the facts are in. the good guy (an NRA member) with a gun got the bad guy. need more good guys & guns. (the cops were going the wrong way)
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The facts are in, he killed 26 people before that happened. The good guy with a gun argument does not and has not ever worked.
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How many would have died if there was no good guy with a gun? Never mind, no one can answer that but it likely would have been more.
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It’s just as possible that a good guy with a gun is not nearly trained enough to fire a weapon in public. That’s just as dangerous.
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I’m gun owner, the majority of people I see carrying weapons are in no way trained well enough to be safely effective in these situations.
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It is so sad that I'm having a hard time these days trying to figure out how
@TheOnion is getting its daily scoops.Satire has become life. -
Really
. Even with the punchlines, both headlines are absolute truth. Sadly funny, if that.
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This could be the first completely real, accurate article from The Onion.
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My brothers and sisters to the south, please figure this shit out. We love you. It’s like watching someone you love dying from drug addiction.
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Nation looks forward to newest
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Perfect. Sad, but perfect.
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The fact is this guy was really just trying to set a new high score.
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"Maybe this will blow over... kind of like the other ones" - assholes
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Ask Ted Cruz the preacher
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