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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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@TheOnion

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Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 4 Nov 2017

    Popular New Amazon Service Just Comes To Your House And Kills You https://trib.al/y2QPesh pic.twitter.com/6LG5MtlLGB

    9:15 AM - 4 Nov 2017
    • 3,993 Retweets
    • 8,721 Likes
    • William Nguyen random person Շɦﻉรρѻѻρץɭﻉ๓ѻก noahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh HRG | ¹Jim³Bob ❁ 💀 MitchieD 💀 kors tay worm on a string is a snack 💀buffy summers💀
    142 replies 3,993 retweets 8,721 likes
      1. New conversation
      2.  🎃 Sp00py Tea  🎃‏ @Tea_Racer 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @daangrydemon *goes on Amazon*

        1 reply 0 retweets 35 likes
      3. The Angry Demon‏ @daangrydemon 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @Tea_Racer @TheOnion

        pic.twitter.com/u3JXpb9QP1

        0 replies 5 retweets 234 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Noon‏ @RSNoon 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @JAC65487

        is this available with next day shipping?

        1 reply 0 retweets 10 likes
      3. JAC‏ @JAC65487 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @RSNoon @TheOnion

        All suicide related services require a 5 day waiting period per the Brady Bill

        1 reply 0 retweets 5 likes
      4. Noon‏ @RSNoon 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @JAC65487 @TheOnion

        they could just use something other than a gun though that'd be alright

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      5. JAC‏ @JAC65487 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @RSNoon @TheOnion

        They’d still make you wait so you have time to cool down and call the hit off

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      6. Noon‏ @RSNoon 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @JAC65487 @TheOnion

        fine but I don't pay for prime for free 2 day shipping for nothing, otherwise an Amazon rep is gonna get a polite but angry email

        1 reply 0 retweets 5 likes
      7. JAC‏ @JAC65487 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @RSNoon @TheOnion

        >he bought amazon prime

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      8. Noon‏ @RSNoon 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @JAC65487 @TheOnion

        Amazon basically owns my paycheck, I'm saving money on the real tho

        2 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      9. JAC‏ @JAC65487 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @RSNoon @TheOnion

        I’ve ordered one package from amazon this year

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      10. End of conversation
      1. MCAP Steve‏ @MCAP_Steve 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        i wish

        0 replies 0 retweets 24 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Angry Moderate 2020‏ @PaulWartenberg 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Wow, the Continential has really diversified its market.pic.twitter.com/7U6c8gMnHE

        0 replies 1 retweet 8 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Tuxedo Jason Mask‏ @TheLoveBel0w 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Antifa Super Soldier delivery.

        1 reply 1 retweet 16 likes
      3. 1 more reply
      1. New conversation
      2. Sean O'Hare‏ @S_E_A_N_I_E__O 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Posting this again isn’t gonna duplicate the amount of retweets/likes you got the first time

        1 reply 0 retweets 19 likes
      3. Hi & Bye  ☁️‏ @jmlf_18 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @S_E_A_N_I_E__O @TheOnion

        No but it could duplicate the amount of reads the article gets or awareness off their satirical posts

        1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
      4. 1 more reply
      1. New conversation
      2. Ben‏ @benseongAT 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I cannot find any reviews on the service. I wonder why.

        1 reply 0 retweets 7 likes
      3. Ace Defective‏ @GossSean42 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @benseongAT @TheOnion

        I found a couple 1 star reviews who claimed they were merely maimed or went to wrong address

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. David Hawley‏ @DavidHawley2 4 Nov 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Can I order this as a gift for someone else?

        0 replies 1 retweet 4 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo

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