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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

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Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 22 Oct 2017

    New Study Finds Average American Stands No Chance Against What’s Coming https://trib.al/fz1K4CC pic.twitter.com/xcOnqLjBez

    8:30 PM - 22 Oct 2017
    • 274 Retweets
    • 942 Likes
    • bonnie jackson Aliza Silverman Allison Scott moruobai Liam Fitzgerald Joel Andrew Pierre-Simon Laplace Patrick Gustavson Selah Barta
    20 replies 274 retweets 942 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Exen with the Big Dork Energy‏ @exentrik137 22 Oct 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        You don't even try to make shit up anymore.

        1 reply 0 retweets 4 likes
      3. Speaxeasy‏ @speaxeasy 22 Oct 2017
        Replying to @exentrik137 @TheOnion

        You almost can't at this point.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. Papa Triste‏ @saddadhouse 22 Oct 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        *post millenial dread intensifies*

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. G Prowler‏ @gprowler 22 Oct 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        And let's not forget to add that the lowest common denominator among Americans is near zero...http://baconplant.com/measure-lowest-common-denominator-among-americans-near-zero/ …pic.twitter.com/QY8f4nLj1N

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. Andrew Circle  🇩🇪 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿‏ @theREALacircle 22 Oct 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        The Onion satire, becoming less and less satirical every day...

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. Speaxeasy‏ @speaxeasy 22 Oct 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Stop being so prescient

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Lynne Reed‏ @LynneReed19 22 Oct 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Sad but true.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. New conversation
      2. Eric Leon‏ @Runtus_Maximus 22 Oct 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I find this oddly comforting.

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. 1 more reply
      1. New conversation
      2. Geena 🌹‏ @geenaroses 22 Oct 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        What is "it" that is being referred to in this article? I could think of several "it's" that are possible to b coming we're no prepared 4.

        2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Exen with the Big Dork Energy‏ @exentrik137 22 Oct 2017
        Replying to @geenaroses @TheOnion

        Put it this way: there is no major disruption to life, society or infrastructure that the average person is at all equipped to handle.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. Speaxeasy‏ @speaxeasy 22 Oct 2017
        Replying to @exentrik137 @geenaroses @TheOnion

        I think that's a bot that just tried to troll the Onion...we really are doomed

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      5. Exen with the Big Dork Energy‏ @exentrik137 22 Oct 2017
        Replying to @speaxeasy @geenaroses @TheOnion

        We'll survive this, the antibodies are developing against this infection already.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      6. End of conversation
      1. Han Shot First‏ @han__shot_first 23 Oct 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        This is true.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Skechy Max Normal‏ @bustmykeyboard 23 Oct 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        "@TheOnion: New Study Finds Average American Stands No Chance Against What’s Coming https://trib.al/fz1K4CC  pic.twitter.com/glHQSbx1c7"

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. mi‏ @missmischief420 23 Oct 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Another fake study on stuff we already know

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Way2dumb‏ @Way2dumb1 23 Oct 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        What they haven't started bending over yet?

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. RostaR‏ @Rosta91 22 Oct 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        What about europe? Need to study us as well!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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