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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 1 Sep 2017

    Report: Someone Probably Masturbating To This Stock Photo Right Now http://trib.al/KeqaM9e pic.twitter.com/EO65GEgyEE

    8:35 PM - 1 Sep 2017
    • 98 Retweets
    • 489 Likes
    • LIL LOVER garbo the spooky scary socialist Matthew Sprague 1/1024th of a Josiah Sean Leandro Prieto Danny Chalmers Needle Pricks The Conclavist
    51 replies 98 retweets 489 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. JH‏ @PeacefulOne26 1 Sep 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Twisted thoughts much? Poor joke since it involves a child. Not funny ever.

        3 replies 0 retweets 14 likes
      3. J.P. Chastain‏ @JPChastain 1 Sep 2017
        Replying to @PeacefulOne26 @Janicehoffman1 @TheOnion

        Your sensitivity to others speech is a bigger threat to America than you realize.

        2 replies 0 retweets 6 likes
      4. meg‏ @megfarm 2 Sep 2017
        Replying to @JPChastain @Janicehoffman1 @TheOnion

        I'll err on the side of advocating for children thankyouverymuch

        2 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
      5. J.P. Chastain‏ @JPChastain 2 Sep 2017
        Replying to @megfarm @Janicehoffman1 @TheOnion

        You guys both did, side of caution. Me and 6 other people laughed, smiled, and would probably kill a pedo on sight. No one is advocatingevil

        2 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      6. meg‏ @megfarm 2 Sep 2017
        Replying to @JPChastain @Janicehoffman1 @TheOnion

        So you'll "kill the pedo" but laugh at what they do? It's like someone saying they're not racist but laughing at racist jokes.

        4 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      7. J.P. Chastain‏ @JPChastain 2 Sep 2017
        Replying to @megfarm @Janicehoffman1 @TheOnion

        Please out of respect, stop twisting a simple joke. You may be offended, and I understand that. You can't save the world from laughing.

        2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      8. meg‏ @megfarm 2 Sep 2017
        Replying to @JPChastain @Janicehoffman1 @TheOnion

        I see your POV. I have young children. I draw a firm line at anything related to sexualizing kids./1

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
      9. End of conversation
      1. J'Bird‏ @Jawwwwwwwwn 1 Sep 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Well. This *was* a parody account.

        0 replies 0 retweets 23 likes
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      1. 𝔸my Czy𝕜  😈 👻‏ @AmyICzyk 1 Sep 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Really weird and creepy, even by @TheOnion standards

        0 replies 0 retweets 8 likes
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      1. not funny or cool‏ @whatever__manny 1 Sep 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        This is the quality media I came here for

        0 replies 0 retweets 9 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
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      1. Teacher Mom‏ @snipes_mosley 1 Sep 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        This isn't funny. Don't use a picture with a child in it.

        0 replies 0 retweets 5 likes
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      1. Jon Edwards  🏹 🇬🇧‏ @jonuk76 1 Sep 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        🤮pic.twitter.com/2c4uIOmmrK

        0 replies 0 retweets 5 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. water & crushed ice‏ @TravisSkrrtt 1 Sep 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        stop subtweeting

        1 reply 0 retweets 8 likes
      3. 1 more reply
      1. New conversation
      2. Eric Spikes‏ @DeeperLeague 1 Sep 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Maybe you guys don't care, IDK, but I think you're funnier when you're less crude.

        1 reply 0 retweets 3 likes
      3. Keenakeet‏ @Keenakeet 1 Sep 2017
        Replying to @DeeperLeague @TheOnion

        Satire isn't always funny

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      4. Kristi Boettcher‏ @Klp1993Phillips 2 Sep 2017
        Replying to @Keenakeet @DeeperLeague @TheOnion

        Juvenalian ... Next headline will be abt selling and eating babies #a modest proposal #potato famine

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      5. End of conversation
      1. Tony D‏ @biff725 1 Sep 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Interesting, who wrote this? Did anyone call the police yet?

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. Ryan Bender‏ @ryanjamesbender 2 Sep 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I love how people are so ready to get offended by a parody account #thisisdefinitelythemostimportanthingtobeworriedaboutrightnow

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
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      1. midwayBetween‏ @mwbhere 2 Sep 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Ppl move into house by airport ➡️ complain. Ppl follow @TheOnion acct ➡️ complain. #MakesSense

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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