Skip to content
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • Moments Moments Moments, current page.

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
Verified account
@TheOnion

Tweets

The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

Tweets

  • © 2018 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 31 May 2017

    Betsy DeVos Warns Of Rising Trend Of Dongs Being Drawn In Textbooks http://trib.al/RVcYKdT  #TrumpDocumentspic.twitter.com/SPSRP1tAOb

    10:27 AM - 31 May 2017
    • 501 Retweets
    • 1,252 Likes
    • Michelle Nappi Lily Ken Weese Deborah Dixie Powless Curt Liljegren Ella Disenchanted Aunt Mary Says John ︽✵︽
    Betsy DeVos
    34 replies 501 retweets 1,252 likes
      1. HeHatesTheseCans!‏ @Navin_Johnson79 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @regularguy @BetsyDeVos

        Would be much easier just to drop penises rather than Dong from 16 Candlespic.twitter.com/TKDqSodFlx

        0 replies 1 retweet 7 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Pirate Nun‏ @u16173 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        It's okay, as long as they are Christian dongs @BetsyDeVos

        0 replies 0 retweets 13 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Michael ES‏ @Turbo_Mike 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        This will be a real news story pretty soon, probably...

        0 replies 1 retweet 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Joseph Gonzales‏ @joseph11ag 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        Joseph Gonzales Retweeted The Onion

        yes, dongs seem to be on the rise these days...https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/869968514005774336 …

        Joseph Gonzales added,

        The OnionVerified account @TheOnion
        Betsy DeVos Warns Of Rising Trend Of Dongs Being Drawn In Textbooks http://trib.al/RVcYKdT  #TrumpDocuments pic.twitter.com/SPSRP1tAOb
        1 reply 0 retweets 4 likes
      3. Mwenda Ikiara‏ @IkiaraMwenda 31 May 2017
        Replying to @joseph11ag @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        tihihihi.... 😂😂😂

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. B 👿b Blaskiewicz  ✌ 💛 👽‏ @rjblaskiewicz 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        Well, clearly we must ban textbooks and learning. Problem solved.

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Jon Smith‏ @mnl_gldstn_trtr 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        So it's all going according to plan, then?

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Ozzie‏ @Jurj_Clooners 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        Textbook graffiti penises are only sex education allowed per DeVos' new curriculum.

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Marko A. Rodriguez‏ @twarko 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        And when they tire of that, they will probably move to drawing schlongs.

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1.  👻 🎃𝕾𝖕𝖑𝖆𝖉𝖆𝖒𝖓𝖊𝖉 🎃 👻‏ @SplAdamSage 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        So much meta to this satire.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Colin Chin‏ @ColinChin51 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        You sure they're not attempts at self portraiture?

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Robbie Howell‏ @robbiehowell 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        Robbie Howell Retweeted Robbie Howell

        https://twitter.com/robbiehowell/status/869970402038206465 …

        Robbie Howell added,

        Robbie Howell @robbiehowell
        Satirical homophobia is the only kind of homophobia I can stomach from this vile woman. She is an insect. https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/869968514005774336 …
        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Barry Ybarra‏ @ybarry45 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        Save the textbooks !🤣pic.twitter.com/VhtsCsoPr0

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Russ Klein‏ @SLCRuss 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        Do they look like her?

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Leon Jacyna‏ @LeonJacyna 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        She has a firm grasp of the subject.

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. 1 more reply
      1. Pete_AZ‏ @Pete_AZ 5 Jun 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        When you measure success by dongs then success can be claimed by DeVos

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Gretchen‏ @Gretche50643443 31 May 2017
        Replying to @TheOnion @BetsyDeVos

        She is so brave to tackle the big issues.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo

    Loading seems to be taking a while.

    Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

      Promoted Tweet

      false

      • © 2018 Twitter
      • About
      • Help Center
      • Terms
      • Privacy policy
      • Cookies
      • Ads info