Skip to content
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • Moments Moments Moments, current page.

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
Verified account
@TheOnion

Tweets

The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

Tweets

  • © 2018 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 12 Nov 2016

    Top Story: Nation’s Optimists Need To Shut The Fuck Up Right Now http://trib.al/Qgl1MbL pic.twitter.com/MLwR5JDpZw

    7:55 AM - 12 Nov 2016
    • 1,416 Retweets
    • 2,913 Likes
    • jülïän ˚✧₊⁎eseab⁎⁺˳✧༚ Beth Jarvi David Darais ᴀɴᴅʀᴇᴡ ʟᴏᴡᴇ mia 🌻 Kevin Shi J. Oliver Jamie Weis
    15 replies 1,416 retweets 2,913 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. Rock Geluk‏ @RockGeluk 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        anyone liberal and under 26 has never lost a federal election yet. maybe explains the protest. get over it!

        2 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Football Meatlong‏ @MichaelJSuich 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @RockGeluk @TheOnion

        many trump supporters talked about marching with guns if he lost. We were going to have protests no matter who lost

        2 replies 0 retweets 7 likes
      4. Rock Geluk‏ @RockGeluk 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @MichaelJSuich @TheOnion

        true but the trumpets had media and Corp agenda against them that the protesters were products of

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      5. End of conversation
      1. Charles Saeger  🌹‏ @LordRasputin 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Charles Saeger  🌹 Retweeted The Onion

        We live in @TheOnion now. And it’s right: we can have no normalization of fascism.https://twitter.com/theonion/status/797467758309085185 …

        Charles Saeger  🌹 added,

        The OnionVerified account @TheOnion
        Top Story: Nation’s Optimists Need To Shut The Fuck Up Right Now http://trib.al/Qgl1MbL  pic.twitter.com/MLwR5JDpZw
        0 replies 0 retweets 6 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Michael Close‏ @close_michael 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        "Whiny Bitches Need To Get Their Heads Out Of Their Precious Asses And Fucking DO Something Besides Cry Or It Will Get Way Worse."

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. tangled_IV‏ @tangled_iv 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Nate Silver Gunned Down Attempting To Cross Mexican Border With All 2016 Polling Data http://www.theonion.com/r/54595  via @theonion

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. leashyourkids‏ @leashyourkids 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Wet dream for a victim culture.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. King David‏ @king888david888 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @catehallpic.twitter.com/S5iCq2VXdT

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Michael Lent1‏ @michaellent2 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Optimistic because he's going to work for GE.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. bill gordon‏ @bgordon916 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        LOL

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Edward Muir‏ @pteddiex 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Ya, positive thinking has no place in a Progressive's agenda!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. charlesborello‏ @Dockbuilderdude 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        finally a great article #Trump2016 is the man now #stfu #crybabiesgoncrylol

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Muneef Bokhari‏ @MuneefBokhari 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        “@TheOnion: Top Story: Nation’s Optimists Need To Shut The Fuck Up Right Now"https://vine.co/v/5InM9Db7pOE 

        Arrzee's post on Vine
        Arrzee's post on Vine
        View on Vine
        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Jay Moose‏ @das_m00se 12 Nov 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        YAAAAAAASS, B! LOVE THIS!!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo

    Loading seems to be taking a while.

    Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

      Promoted Tweet

      false

      • © 2018 Twitter
      • About
      • Help Center
      • Terms
      • Privacy policy
      • Cookies
      • Ads info