Skip to content
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • Moments Moments Moments, current page.

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
Verified account
@TheOnion

Tweets

The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

Tweets

  • © 2018 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 3 Sep 2016

    Dirty, Bearded Vince Foster Bursts Through Doors Of Clinton Fundraiser http://onion.com/2cxpDZ5 pic.twitter.com/M7Z5kEDPOu

    6:28 AM - 3 Sep 2016
    • 276 Retweets
    • 538 Likes
    • trump vs Reality Uord Debra OldCrow🔹🌽 Lucy Finley Mona Fernando C. Debra Ramirez terry sullivan Connor Randall
    24 replies 276 retweets 538 likes
      1. dizaryna‏ @canny_alan 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Thank goodness, I thought Charles Manson was released by Obama.

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Karen Kline‏ @ConsiderThis1 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Did you have your new owner, Hillary, vet this? @TheOnion @Old_Bern_Kenobi

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1.  ✈ 👑Copters4Commies 🔦  🇮🇪 🇫🇷 🇵🇱‏ @ToddORiley 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        rofl

        0 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Captain Dreadlocke ❌Undead Bot ❌‏ @CaptDreadlocke 6 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion @ChrisLoesch

        See what happens when ya party with Elvis and the Lizard King.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Deplorable Kathy‏ @KathyPizzol 4 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @VistaJakepic.twitter.com/mbE2xxdwBc

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Fixer Guy‏ @Fixer_guy 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Are u guys SURE that Clintons' Brock Trolls approved this message?

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. BOOce Tennant‏ @BruceTennant 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Here's one for the Alex "Son of Jim" Jones Kool-Aid drinkers!

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Ben Willis‏ @4benwillis 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @joshtpm Sounds like plot of next @DineshDSouza movie!

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Jonathan Gray‏ @Johnny_Gray_ 10 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        He might be ancient & bearded but Hillary would still fuck him. Then kill him again.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. john hancock‏ @johnhan79583770 5 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion @jimbearNJ

        .. Now that's funny

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. ItsWhiteBoyDay‏ @CJmoonsailer 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @benshapiro @cultofdusty is this you??? Lool

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Rex Banner‏ @Inspectjavert 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion @benshapiro

        UPDATE: Vince Foster "trips" and falls to his death from a bridge, onto a bullet.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. eve‏ @evegpt 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @benshapiro So, did he say where he's been and who killed him?

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Herpules‏ @smeltonfelter 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        he's the new write in. Foster 2016.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Craig S. Bell‏ @craig_s_bell 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @allahpundit I hear Clooney is interested.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. King Jayhu‏ @jayhaller82 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Hahaha that's funny

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. The Headless Knight‏ @deknightberight 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @allahpundit Man, that is great. xD

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Tyrone‏ @average_man_1 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        https://soundcloud.com/shuffle-pod/vacations …

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. Mr. Mustard‏ @mattlcholmes 3 Sep 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        LMMFAO

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo

    Loading seems to be taking a while.

    Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

      Promoted Tweet

      false

      • © 2018 Twitter
      • About
      • Help Center
      • Terms
      • Privacy policy
      • Cookies
      • Ads info