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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 22 Jul 2016

    Nation's Joggers Sick Of Finding Dead Bodies http://onion.com/2aeINi6 pic.twitter.com/atkchp5jSq

    1:26 PM - 22 Jul 2016
    • 442 Retweets
    • 1,432 Likes
    • CathAttack berto Isaac Drury Cath Taylor alex Oluwabomi Oluwatomi Faith Adekoya Agreeable Contrarian LGD Mech
    25 replies 442 retweets 1,432 likes
      1. GlorpDieBlorp‏ @acerbicBUSH 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @Chartoc Pokemon Go players offer to carry on the duty.

        0 replies 1 retweet 2 likes
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      1. Big Bad Bloodydamn.‏ @redjill55 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        And yet they always think the body is a manikin. Like manikins just lie around everywhere.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Brad C‏ @DogfishBradford 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Da-Dumpic.twitter.com/aKCTAmwpjE

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Nuromanca‏ @Nuromanca 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        You'll only encourage a new generation of joggers to compete for selfie slaystakes.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Cool internet corpse‏ @korbokuin 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Is that... Loadsamoney?

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Bernard Silverman‏ @DonKeehotey 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Creative joggers suggested adding dead bodies to barriers for the Olympic Steeplechase "since they're lying around anyway."

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. ᴷᴵᴰ ᴹᴵᴸᴸᴵˢ JUUL‏ @uwucozyboy 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        im living for this photoshop

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Perry Contreras‏ @goldchocobo23 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        The lesson here is that murderers need to be more considerate where they dump their bodies. Civilized folk use the city dump tyvm

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Vanessa Belle‏ @cvhporter 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        I live satire. Do you hire amateurs lol? I have some stories to tell

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. The Feckless Oneter‏ @patricioblou 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Dave @attell wants his joke back...

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. vperry‏ @VickiPerry30 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Funny!

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Mo Ohless‏ @srwillow19 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        well then don't jog,I never find dead bodies driving and I don't sweat or get out of breath. Stupid f**kin joggers always bitchy.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Minuteman Waiting‏ @4RNation 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Wear blinders. Crimes down says the president....

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Clark Canfield‏ @ClarkCanfield1 22 Jul 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Norm McDonald thinks so too.

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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