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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 14 Jun 2016

    "This country has always managed to find a way to put me first." http://onion.com/1OnHPRz pic.twitter.com/7maZV0bMNP

    11:17 AM - 14 Jun 2016
    • 6,818 Retweets
    • 7,305 Likes
    • Adam Kittleson giselle durand 6(12) god . ⏳ Sam Voda H Dillon Welch toni bug 🥂
    79 replies 6,818 retweets 7,305 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 15 Jun 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        An AR-15: http://onion.com/1XX3W4Q pic.twitter.com/MYfaUcQe8r

        9 replies 363 retweets 593 likes
      3. 2 more replies
      1. New conversation
      2. Jamie Lesser‏ @Userpriority 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        you Obama stooges dont want to blame radical Islam.Europe has tough gun control didnt stop Paris. Or R u too stupid & forgot

        5 replies 1 retweet 2 likes
      3. La nueva religión‏ @_cjeezus 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @Userpriority @TheOnion

        Paris was ONE attack over decades. The US has shootings every 3 days.

        4 replies 3 retweets 31 likes
      4. Sully Baseball‏ @sullybaseball 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @_cjeezus @Userpriority @TheOnion

        Jamie is just joking. Nobody is that stupid

        1 reply 0 retweets 7 likes
      5. 1 more reply
      1. Ginger Ghostly‏ @GingerMostly 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @MortuaryReport it's sad how the Onion is barely a parody news site at this point, bc the reality is a parody of itself already.

        0 replies 0 retweets 16 likes
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      1. Hassan S. Ali‏ @hassanisms 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        "You see, I’m just a humble lightweight, magazine-fed semi-automatic rifle; I never expected this kind of outpouring of affection"

        0 replies 0 retweets 8 likes
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
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      1. New conversation
      2. Jamie Lesser‏ @Userpriority 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Thats right onion idiots deflect blame on guns not Obama ISIS policy, Gunman had a carry permit and another handgun but blame AR!5

        3 replies 1 retweet 4 likes
      3. 1 more reply
      1. New conversation
      2. TLDuryea‏ @TinaDuryea 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        ban it. #BanTheAR15 #onegunatatime https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/petition/ban-ar-15-civilian-ownership …

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      3. Tristan Herzog‏ @tristanherz 15 Jun 2016
        Replying to @TinaDuryea @TheOnion

        pleeeeease come take it. Please. Please.

        1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      4. TLDuryea‏ @TinaDuryea 15 Jun 2016
        Replying to @tristanherz @TheOnion

        I know the gun is your penis substitute but would you be willing to go to jail to keep it?

        2 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      5. Tristan Herzog‏ @tristanherz 15 Jun 2016
        Replying to @TinaDuryea @TheOnion

        I won't go to jail, I'll die.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      6. TLDuryea‏ @TinaDuryea 15 Jun 2016
        Replying to @tristanherz @TheOnion

        one less gun nut to worry about. Sounds like a win to me.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      7. End of conversation
      1. menehunemedia‏ @menehunemedia 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Hahaha, except for him:pic.twitter.com/Yw6xNpGAPu

        0 replies 0 retweets 3 likes
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      1. New conversation
      2. Kaitlin‏ @KTTheorist 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @TheOnion

        even though I'm only an accessory they still give me all the credit

        1 reply 0 retweets 8 likes
      3. Mike V‏ @N7Paragade 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @KTTheorist @TheOnion

        It's kind of a key element, like it or not; you don't get nearly as high body counts with knives, bats, etc.

        2 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. Kaitlin‏ @KTTheorist 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @N7Paragade @TheOnion

        but a knife is still capable of killing people and it requires no background check or licence

        2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      5. Mike V‏ @N7Paragade 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @KTTheorist @TheOnion

        True, but it's a lot harder when you have to run up to people. Guns make it infinitely easier to kill a lot of people.

        2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      6. Kaitlin‏ @KTTheorist 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @N7Paragade @TheOnion

        it would infinitely more easy to use explosives to but after bombing they don't blame explosives they blame the person

        2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      7. Mike V‏ @N7Paragade 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @KTTheorist @TheOnion

        Outside of events like Boston and OKC, homemade bombs don't usually kill in high numbers. Mostly, they don't even work

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      8. Kaitlin‏ @KTTheorist 14 Jun 2016
        Replying to @N7Paragade @TheOnion

        and mass shooting statically kill even fewer gang violence kills thousands a year even in states with uber strict laws

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
      9. End of conversation

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