@TheOnion I HAVE THE CAFFEINE PATCH. EACH PATCH IS EQUIVALENT TO 12 CUPS OF COFFEE. YOU CAN STAY AWAKE FOR DAYS WITH NO SIDE EFFECTS
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Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion I think you should go back to satire.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion love the Onion Perspective. Keep it up. But the caffeine bracelet is illegal.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion How does it taste?Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion does it have to be boiling hot when you attach it?Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Come on now, popping pills has been out of fashion for years, shooting H is the new thing.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Really, when did pills become substitute for drinking the hemlock? Modernity. The farce of time.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Won't catch on.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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