@TheOnion
"Mummy and Daddy hate each other. Choose."
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Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion You know kid, the only problem between you and your father is that law forbids ending someone's life, I had to leave!Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion#SesameStreet was planning an episode on this. Then it all fell apart.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Kids question "Well okay you r breakin up but are you and dad still going to have anal sex?"Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion i hope she's keeping the cd collection in the prenupThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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