@TheOnion Santa's bones??!! But he's alive and well and living in England! http://tinyurl.com/z7fj3hm #SantaLives
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@TheOnion Go to the mall dressed up like the BVM and ask the moslums if they will help you find your donkey named mohamed.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Pretend to be a small crippled British child while wishing everyone in the mall Happy ChristmasThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion OH NO, IT'S THE MANTLE MONSTER!Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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