@TheOnion Jared will get all the free footlongs he wants in prison, but they wont be from Subway.
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@TheOnion I knew Jared always wanted to get into some smaller pants.....#jared#smallerpants@Mattyice716Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion "Serves#JaredFogle right, for paying those girls for sex."--Bill CosbyThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion No shit, the Subway he 'walked' to everyday to 'lose' weight was directly below his apartment. Cashier called him a stalker.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion "Still looking good..."Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Hey, Jared, can you say stupid? (Allegedly)Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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Does this mean I can't eat at subway anymore? Like Cosby suddenly isn't supposed to be funny now.
@TheOnion#WhatDoYouThinkThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion@andrewscru following the onion was a power moveThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion "allegedly"Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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