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TheOnion's profile
The Onion
The Onion
The Onion
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@TheOnion

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The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008

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    The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 20 Jul 2015

    "I want you to first demonstrate that you can show me a wonderful time." http://onion.com/1fhKafJ pic.twitter.com/Yh3HXzxtCK

    11:37 AM - 20 Jul 2015
    • 448 Retweets
    • 758 Likes
    • ᗤΪᗧ booty casket Little queen the bigliest dong Heritage GSA Jordan Ruiz David Clark Anna catherine weingarten
    19 replies 448 retweets 758 likes
      1. New conversation
      2. The Onion‏Verified account @TheOnion 20 Jul 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        Lloyd Rutledge, father: http://onion.com/1fhLBe5 pic.twitter.com/bcheyFE5eO

        1 reply 44 retweets 116 likes
      3. 2 more replies
      1. Larry Rosenthal‏ @LarryRosenthal 20 Jul 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion isnt this the plot of that david duchovney/charlie manson show?:)

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. Joseph 'Trick or Eat' Satan‏ @JoeAconite 20 Jul 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion So, second base at least.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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      1. New conversation
      2. Lisa‏ @Bonelessfluff 20 Jul 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion I refuse to date anyone unless I date their parents first. And if the parents don't put out, I break off all contact.

        1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
      3. Anah Jochebed‏ @AnahJochebed 21 Jul 2015
        Replying to @Bonelessfluff

        @Bonelessfluff @TheOnion ABSOLUTELY! God knows the monster hidden.

        0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
      4. End of conversation
      1. Anah Jochebed‏ @AnahJochebed 21 Jul 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion that might actually be a good idea! ;o)

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Pancake™‏ @wendler_e 20 Jul 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion @sewendler

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. wm shulski‏ @wmshulski 20 Jul 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion man, I never tried to put the make on a mid-aged father..uh uh

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Llama Man‏ @antitory63 20 Jul 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion The American Right eh????

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Duh Berry‏ @ANewKind0fBerry 20 Jul 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion @alexburnsNYT If you want to date my daughter make sure to bring over #ANewKind0fBerry

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. The Angry Liberal‏ @angryandliberal 20 Jul 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion An awful lot of daughters lose suitors to their dads that way. "Sorry, Pumpkin. Jimmy and I just clicked."

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Dietrich Buxtehude‏ @Buxtehude11 20 Jul 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion Almost as creepy as me!pic.twitter.com/Vjm7QNbLpq

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. MRT‏ @maryrosetansey 20 Jul 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion @vinylpatriot

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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      1. Francis Salamanca‏ @Salamanderfs 20 Jul 2015
        Replying to @TheOnion

        @TheOnion time to pull out all the #Tinder pickup lines! #TinderPickupLines

        0 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
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