TIP: Avoid wind erosion by staying at the beach no longer than 500 yearshttp://onion.com/1LFQg6l
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@TheOnion We love it! If anyone needs real tips, we've got some:http://rdcrss.org/beachtipsThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@CaitlinOToole_ so accurate it hurtsThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion #1 teach responsibility #2 teach to swim #3 actually "parent" #4 repeat steps 1-3 as necessary #5 enjoy & remember you wanted themThanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion I suffer w/beach phobia-wave in Bay Area tried to sweep away my 3 yr old w/me 5 ft away, pregnant.Scared, 20 yrs+ What to do?Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion Poor taste in light of recent international events?Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion knowing the universal distress signal choreography is essential!Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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@TheOnion hey@SaraWhite according to this I should throw raw meat at them, not punch them. I'll try that! -
@brettistweeting@TheOnion damn... why didn't i think of that?!?!
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@TheOnion don't go to NC; they love sharks!Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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